Walker
by sakurademonalchemist
Summary: Harry, son of Gabriel the Arch Angel, is stranded out of place and time after the attack from Micheal. In order to return back to his alternate reality, he must put an end to the Apocalypse and figure out how he's supposed to stop Lucifer in his own time. The only question is whether or not this Angelic version of the infamous Doctor will survive 134 alternates!
1. Hunter Recap

_**The story so far on Hunter**_

_**OR**_

_**That really annoying recap that you can skip on the DVDs...**_

Harry goes on a random camping trip with his 'family' and encounters a Wendigo, setting him on the path to become a hunter. Eight years later, Harry summons Loki, AKA Gabriel the arch angel, in order to learn Enochian symbols and instead starts off a chain-reaction.

A few months after dealing with the Toad via bringing Loki to Hogwarts, Harry meets the Winchesters for the first time. At the end of fifth year, Harry brings in his Hunter contacts to deal with Voldemort so he can live his own life and begins traveling with either Gabriel or the Winchester brothers and begins a company to provide internet and cell phone service to hunters which he called the Monkey Magic Corporation. The company is a major hit and quickly rises in the business world, not that he pays attention to it.

When Dean is sent to hell, Harry steps in to keep Sam from killing himself with depression, and to keep Ruby from getting her claws into him. When Dean came back, Harry fills them in on things that no one bothered to tell either brother...that they are the chosen vessels for Lucifer and Micheal in the war to come, and that Lilith was going to be breaking seals now that Dean had come back. In order to keep the angels out of the loop, Harry helps Dean contact Castiel, the angel of Thursday who saved Dean from hell's grasp.

Shortly after the rising of the Witnesses, Gabriel tells Harry that the Winchester brothers aren't the only ones dealing with fate...Harry has two prophecies hanging over his head, one of which has never been completed before in all the 'resets' that happen when the world is about to end. It is then that Harry finds out that God and Fate have been essentially turning back the clock, and that it's Fate's fault that he had gone on that ill-fated camping trip and encountered the Wendigo.

Shortly after the Weasly twins flee to America, Harry learns that Dumbledore isn't as Light as he claims and makes plans to deal with him after the war.

Harry, as a joke, creates a website he calls the "Hunter Kill Count" which ranks every hunter in the world and the site takes off.

Sometime later, Harry learns of a stranded angel by the name of Anna, and takes her to Gabriel for sanctuary. This leads to the question of why Harry can pick up on angel chatter, as they have no idea who his angelic half belongs to, leading to a short trip to the past where Harry finally takes his NEWTs. It is there that he finds out that Gabriel had been at Hogwarts before...as James Potter, his father. With this new information, Harry realizes that the killing curse threw Gabriel out of his vessel and gave him partial amnesia, while explaining why the two had gotten along so easily.

When the angels take note of the increased activity, Harry returns to his own time and very little changes between the recently discovered Father/Son duo, even though cambions are usually killed on sight by angels.

Harry also discovers his animagus form, which is a bi-winged alicorn with a golden pelt.

When Harry goes to help Dean with Sam's addiction to demon's blood, he is captured and ends up fulfilling both prophecies at the same time by killing Lilith and dragging Voldemort to hell with him, where his father's grace protects him from the demons awaiting him.

In Hell, Harry finds six Grace Vials, all that remains of an angel's grace when an angel falls into Lucifer's domain...including Lucifer's grace, which was lost when he fell into hell.

Upon his return, Harry notes that the relationship between the Winchester brothers has frayed and is stuck rescuing Dean from Zachariah's scheme to make him say yes to Micheal when he is trapped in an alternate future that had happened a while ago. When they return from that future, Gabriel comes clean to Castiel and the Winchester brothers about what was really going on and what would happen. Because of the fact he dragged Voldemort to hell when he had the other two Hallows, Harry is the unofficial Master of Death until Death rises from the pit and they are able to complete his ring to send Lucifer back down to his cage.

Harry has achieved what Gabriel calls a 'partial ascension' due to his rise from the pit of hell without falling, meaning he is more angel than human, despite being Death's current master. Another side effect is that Harry now resembles Gabriel's current vessel more strongly than he does a green-eyed James Potter with a lightning scar, as this scar had been erased upon Voldemort's destruction.

During his first official hunt, Harry stumbles upon a young cambion named Jesse and rescues him before either side finds him and offers the boy sanctuary and training, as well as a new job for his parents and essentially claims Jesse as his own younger brother, having wanted one since he was younger.

In order to deal with Dumbledore once and for all, Harry returns to England and systematically destroys everything tying him to England and 'kills' his Potter identity, no longer wanting anything to do with the sheep that had tried to destroy him from the inside out. He also frees his godfather from an illegal arrest, which had been a trap for 'Harry Potter'. At this point he takes the name Gabriel Winchester Evans as his main identity, and leaves his Harry Potter one behind for good.

Harry has offered to teach the Winchester brothers magic, since their natural cores had been freed from both angelic (Dean) and demonic (Sam) influences. The brothers are currently going through all seven years of magical education.

A few months in, Sam and Dean are called by a former hunter to a psychiatric hospital for a hunt...only Bree forces them to get out some long seated issues before they go as a precaution, leading to open counseling sessions for every hunter where they can safely vent.

Bree is confronted by Zachariah and with the assistance of Gabriel banishes the angel to heaven until he learns his lesson. He is later confronted by Lucifer but leaves before anything really happens.

Bree and Sam, tired of the unspoken tension between Castiel and Dean, lock them in an angel proof room for a week.

After Dean and Castiel finally resolve their unspoken tension, Zachariah tries to kill both brothers by murdering their parents in the past, sparking a race to get to Mary and John first...there was one catch though. Bree finally learns the identity of the hunter who saved his life during the incident with the Wendigo that set him on the path of a hunter...it was himself!

Upon his return to the present, Bree comes down with a mysterious illness caused by close proximity to Death using Necromancy. While the situation is resolved easily enough by the brothers, his condition forces Gabriel to smash one of the Grace Vials which sends Bree straight to Heaven...where Zachariah is waiting for him.

It is in Heaven that they get confirmation that God cannot act until after this spat between Micheal and Lucifer is over, and that Bree's status as Gabriel's son is actually the doing of Fate. Bree is also surprised to learn that while he is allowed into Heaven, he will never find peace until his task is completed. In this case, putting an end to Lucifer so that he is either dead or sealed away forever as the incomplete seal had forced both God and Fate to 'reset' the world multiple times already.

In Heaven, Bree also comes face-to-face with his dead mother, Lily Evans. She is less than happy to learn the real reason why she had yet to see James since they died together.

Soon after his return from Heaven, they encounter the Whore of Babylon, which lead to Castiel telling them that there had been countless Walkers in history, though Bree was the first one who was only half angel and half human. Bree also settles on a name to go by when disguised as an angel and decided to call himself Kibeth after the character from one of his favorite series. Castiel is less than happy that he has to seal Bree's grace temporarily, as such a thing is normally against the rules because Bree is a higher class of angel compared to Castiel.

A few weeks later Adam Winchester, Sam and Dean's younger half brother, is resurrected by the angels as a stand-in since Dean refuses to agree to be Micheal's vessel. Bree takes Dean's place using polyjuice and attempts to help rescue Adam, only to nearly be captured by Micheal who takes Adam by force.

Bree's power as the Walker kicks into full gear, sending him back to the initial try at sealing Lucifer back in the Pit permanently and he must now make his way through the various alternates until he finds his own time line once more.

And now, back to our story...


	2. Canon Alternate, Changing Channels

_**Canon Universe, set during 'Changing Channels'**_

Bree woke up in a familiar warehouse...it was the one his dad had used to make Dean and Sam go through all those old shows. Then again he had been watching reruns all week, so it wasn't that odd.

Bree popped his head in and noticed something odd.

Sam and Dean were way too tense around Loki, like they expected him to attack them or something. He listened to what they were saying and realized that this wasn't his reality, but that of one long past...one where Gabriel hadn't revealed himself early. Seeing Sam there gave Bree an idea, and a few snaps later he was ready.

This was going to be good!

Everyone paused in the 'interrogation' of the rogue arch angel when they heard a strange wheezing sound. Sammy looked around in confusion...and recognition. No matter how he denied it, he was a nerd enough to recognize the sound of a T.A.R.D.I.S. coming in when he heard it.

Near where the door was, a familiar blue telephone box from Britain appeared.

"No way," said Sam in shock. When the door opened another thing popped out at them. He looked _exactly_ like David Tennant, the guy who played the 10th Doctor in the series, right down to his wardrobe. Sam looked past him inside the box and it was exact down to the last detail from the show. He could even see the sonic screwdriver lying on the console.

"Sammy, who is that?" asked Dean in confusion.

"I can't be! _Doctor Who_ is just a show!" said Sam almost in denial.

"Sorry about that! Fell asleep while the ship was on random!" said Bree cheerfully, his British accent genuine enough to give Sam and Dean flashbacks of a certain thief.

"Do you mind buddy? We're in the middle of something!" said Dean, not trusting him one bit.

"Don't mind me, it's not as if the end of the world relies on two muttonheads riding a puke green Impala," said Bree.

"It's black," said Dean automatically.

"Not from what my screen told me," said Bree. Neither brother noticed the snap from inside his coat.

Dean paled and raced outside.

"MY BABY!"

Sam caught a glimpse of puke green before the door closed.

"You know he's going to kill you right?" said Sam to the Trickster. Gabriel hadn't told them his real name, but he was enjoying the show either way.

"Wasn't my doing," said Gabriel far too cheerfully. Dean's reaction had been hilarious.

"I don't care if you are an angel! You're a deep-fried one as far as I'm concerned!" shouted Dean when he came back in.

Bree cackled openly.

"It wasn't him!" he said, unable to maintain his transformation. Everyone blinked at the sudden appearance of a much younger Trickster.

"There's _TWO _of you?" said Dean in horror.

"Name's Bree. Sorry, couldn't resist pranking you. Talk about uptight about your precious car!" snickered Bree.

"What are you?" demanded Dean, his gun aimed at Bree. He was going to shoot him either way, but he wanted to know if Bree would live through it.

"Can't tell ya. But I do have one question for you Loki...why are you so dead-set on the idjit brothers to play their parts when they just have to get three more rings and a stone in order to seal Lucy back in the pit permanently?" asked Bree.

"What?" said Sam.

"Well the only way to stop this is to either A, say yes to the two stubborn brothers, or B, find all four rings of the horsemen and the stone Death hid in human hands and seal Lucifer back into the pit forever."

"There's a way to stop them without saying yes? Why the hell haven't we heard about this?!" said Dean.

"Because it requires someone stupid enough to face all four horsemen and who isn't afraid of flying," said Bree with a grin.

"Why flying?" asked Sam.

"The stone is in Britain, though you would have to disguise yourself as a witch in order to find it," said Bree.

Gabriel snorted.

"What's so funny?" asked Dean.

"The reason no one mentioned it is because it's unlikely anyone would be able to find the stone. Death set it loose among mortals long before he had been sealed, and not even the angels know where it is," he said.

"Don't play the idiot Gabriel. Every angel knows about the Hallows, but no one bothered to make the connection," said Bree.

"Gabriel. As in the arch angel?" said Sam.

"This idjit got tired of seeing Micheal and Lucy fight all the time and bailed. The only reason he even bothers with you two is because you're the vessels, and he wants the fighting to be over with already. It never even occurred to him that all you would have to do is go to Britain and ask for the Master of Death to get the stone that Death took from his ring," said Bree.

"Oh please, like they could possibly find Potter with Dean here terrified of planes," said Gabriel.

"Who said they had to fly?" asked Bree.

"Only an angel or a magical could teleport them that far without a plane, and I don't see Castiel being stupid enough to take them that far," said Gabriel.

Bree rolled his eyes. Then he looked at Dean.

"I assume you remember the trip that ass Zachariah put you through where the Croatoan virus was set loose? That becomes fact without the stone, even if you neither of you say yes. If you continue on as you have been, Adam will be revived and Sam will throw himself and your half brother into the pit to seal Lucifer, but without Death's ring being completed, the seal will be incomplete and he will break free and set the virus loose. Micheal will be sealed in the pit, which was why your future self was never able to agree to be his vessel...he couldn't escape from the pit as easily as Lucifer had," said Bree.

"Wait, you're saying that unless we get this stone, we can't stop Lucifer?

"Death took it off his ring, which was the central key to sealing Lucifer back in the pit. The stone itself is in the hands of a wizard, but not one you can just walk up and kill. If you were to explain why you need the stone and what is going on, he will help you. He's got this little issue that has gotten him into more trouble than it's worth for years," said Bree dismissively.

"This is insane! There's no way these two muttonheads will find the other horsemen and Death's Stone without getting killed or accepting either of my brothers!" said Gabriel

"They won't find the horsemen, the horsemen will find them. All they have to do is follow the signs, and it will lead them to a general area. Remember, Lucifer_ wants_ Sam to say yes, and by extension so do most of the Horsemen. They'll be drawn to the idjits like you to sugar," said Bree. He then remembered something.

"Oh, and bring Castiel back. He's not as annoying as the rest of your brothers, even if his quest to find god was doomed to fail."

"What?" said Dean.

"His quest to find god was doomed to fail. Because this is about free will, God can't interfere, so he quit caring. Even if you _did_ find him, and that's a massive if, he can't help you. Luckily Fate it seems wants the humans to have their own ace against the two idiot arch angels, so they sent an equalizer."

"And who would that be?" said Gabriel crossly. Bree tossed him a chocolate bar to calm him down.

"Me."

"What can a Trickster do?" said Dean dismissively.

"Why don't you ask Castiel who the Walking Man is, and watch his reaction," countered Bree. Suddenly Gabriel choked on his chocolate.

Sam and Dean looked at Gabriel, beating his chest to clear out the errant candy.

"What's up with him?" asked Dean. Gabriel brought Castiel back, if only to have someone to share his shock with.

"Gabriel," said Cas.

"Cas, who's the Walking man?" asked Sam.

"He's out too?" said Castiel is horror.

"Who's the Walking Man?"

"God and Fate's greatest equalizer. If something is badly out of control, such as Lucifer going rampant or a demon who the hunters haven't killed, then the Walker is chosen to reset the scales. The last time he was out, Germany burned," said Castiel with a shudder.

"Oi. I am not that evil. Britain might burn, but that's only out of spite," said Bree annoyed.

Castiel looked at Bree and winced.

"You are the newest Walker aren't you?" he said.

"Fate's avatar in the world of the mortals, at your service. I'm here to correct a few things and hopefully find my way home."

"What do you mean 'your way home'?" asked Gabriel, having cleared the chocolate out of his throat.

"I'm not from this time line. Because the seal was incomplete, Lucifer ran rampant and fate became pissed off so they 'reset' the clock as it were with a few minor corrections. Basically the world was destroyed and brought back 134 times after this and you never really beat Lucifer because no one gave you the right information," shrugged Bree.

"So what, we should just sit up and die?" asked Dean.

"I never said that. I said the world ended repeatedly because no one told you everything that you needed to know. I'm fairly sure Fate sent me back this far to correct that and all the other bad endings...at least that's the only thing I can think of to explain why you two don't even know who the Master of Death is."

That seemed to relax Dean and Sam a bit. They were tired of not getting all the facts from the people around them.

"For instance, no one explained to you two idjits that the Colt has a bad habit of not working on arch angels, even former ones."

"What?" said Dean.

"The Colt won't work on Lucifer," said Bree patiently.

"Why?"

"Partly because he's a former arch angel, but mostly because he would overpower it. It can kill any demon, but angels are a hit and miss depending on their power levels. Oh and next time you see that douche Zachariah, do me a favor and kick him in the balls. I have a score to settle with that arrogant prick," said Bree with far too much enthusiasm. Dean looked equally eager to fulfill that request.

Bree snapped his fingers, releasing Gabriel from the circle before he remade the T.A.R.D.I.S. and prepared to leave.

"If you can do that much, can't you just poof off and vanish like Cas?" asked Dean.

"Well yeah, but this is way more fun. Besides, aren't you tired of people popping in without a warning?" asked Bree at the door.

Sam gave him a thumbs up. Dean saw that and said "Nerds."

Bree couldn't help his shot back at him "Grease monkey."

Sam snorted.

The fake T.A.R.D.I.S. wheezed into life and slowly vanished to the confusion of Cas and amusement of Gabriel.

_**Okay, there is the first one-shot of Walker and the initial work of Bree. I will write out which alternate Bree is in as the chapter title until he gets back home.**_


	3. Canon Alternate, My Bloody Valentine

_**Canon Universe, "My Bloody Valentine"**_

Sam and Dean were on the road into town, as they found two people who literally ate themselves to death. Ever since the warehouse they had been keeping an eye out for the Walker, as Cas called him. He seemed to be the only being willing to give them a straight up answer without dragging it out.

About the only thing they'd found was the mysterious "Monkey Magic Hotline", which had appeared shortly after their father's death. According to the grapevine it was the best place to find answers to problems, demonic or not.

They had only heard good things about it from Bobby, who had called it once and gotten some genuine info on how to kill hellhounds.

Rumor had it that the research monkey (what hunters called those too cowardly to actually take up hunting as a profession) was a closet shut-in who had an encounter with a demon.

Another rumor said that the one who ran the service could read and speak angel glyphs, but that was unconfirmed.

It was after the second double suicide that Dean decided to put that rumor to the test.

"_Welcome to the Monkey Magic Hotline, your source for all Hunter info on how to kill things demonic and supernatural! How may I help you?"_ came the cheerful voice over the phone. It was the pre-recorded message that somewhat annoyed hunters. Next came a list of options, which somewhat made sense considering it helped the guy figure out what they needed so he could send it to them fast. Dean quickly pressed five for 'other' and got something most hunters didn't get. The voice of the operator.

"_Hello, Monkey Magic to the rescue~! What info do you need?"_

Dean somewhat recognized the voice, but couldn't place it.

"We have possible angel sigils on a heart we need translating."

Then something happened that nearly gave him a heart attack of his own.

"_Hello Dean! I was wondering if you would ever call!"_

"How do you know my name?"Dean demanded.

"_Hold on...it's easier to explain if I come to you first."_

Sam looked up from the organs he was looking at when he heard the sound of the T.A.R.D.I.S. appearing. To his minor disappointment the famous blue box didn't appear, but a familiar face did, even if they had only seen it once.

"You have got to be kidding me. _You're_ Monkey Magic?" said Dean.

It was the Walker.

"Bree at your service. My nickname before I was called Bree is Monkey Magic, because I'm a research monkey who happens to be magical. So what do you two need?"

"Uh, we found some angel sigils on these hearts and wanted to test if you could really read them," said Sam after he got over his shock.

"Let's see... the angel sigil for 'union' commonly associated with cupids. What were the circumstances for their deaths?" he asked Sam.

"Double suicide. One couple ate each other, the other shot themselves," said Dean.

"You're dealing with Famine, which is a bad thing because one of the hungers he can awaken is addiction," said Bree looking at Sam pointedly.

"Wait, you mean a horsemen caused this?"

"Yeah, and while I doubt he can affect you Dean, Sam might find his addiction to demon's blood come back too strongly to ignore. The only way to keep your brother from hunting down demons in town is to have someone with him at all times," said Bree flatly.

"Shit."

"Don't worry Dean, I can handle any demons sent to capture Sam...but you will need back-up," said Bree.

"What makes you think I would trust you with my brother?" said Dean.

"One, the only addiction I've ever had is to research, which considering what I do to earn cash is a good thing. Two, I don't have any demon's blood in me which means Sam won't be inclined to go all Dracula on me. And three, do you really think Bobby would be able to handle demons better than the Walker can?" asked Bree.

"You're not a demon?" said Sam.

"I'm a cambion like Jesse, only unlike him I didn't have any demon parents."

"Well if you're not a demon-blood what the hell are you?"

"Something one-of-a-kind. An angelic cambion. Rarely happens cause the angels tend to kill the mother, but I got off lucky because Fate already had me under a prophecy. They can't kill prophecy children until after it's been completed, and by that time it was too late."

"That's it, I'm calling Cas," said Dean.

Dean swore when Castiel appeared, cell phone still in hand.

"You have got to quit doing that! A little warning would be appreciated!" said Dean.

"Why do you think I always play the T.A.R.D.I.S. sound when I show up?" cackled Bree.

"What is he doing here?" asked Cas.

"They called to see if I could really read and speak Enochian. Famine is using a cherub's work to kill people," said Bree.

"How do you know the cupid hasn't gone rogue?"

"Well it has all the handiwork of Famine, but if you want to be sure..." said Bree, inwardly handled his evil laughter.

He knew it was Famine, but the blackmail he could get from a cupid's "handshake" was too funny to resist.

Thank god for video phones.

* * *

"You knew, didn't you?" said Dean with a scowl at Bree.

"Hell yes I knew! You think I would pass up seeing the look on your face when Cupid hugged you without any clothes on?" said Bree, unconcerned about the fact he had been hugged first from behind.

"I hate you," said Dean flatly.

"Not as much as you will when I tell you who you're fate-bonded to!" snickered Bree.

"I can't believe you thought you could break an angel's nose!" laughed Bree.

"What the hell is this about a fate-bond? What is that anyway?" asked Dean.

"A fate-bond means that you were doomed to fall for each other from the start. Fate, unlike heaven, doesn't bother to interfere directly but rather sets up the circumstances for a bond to happen naturally. Cupids tend to avoid people with a fate bond because interference from heaven might cause a war," answered Castiel.

"Or it might just make you more attracted to each other than normal," said Bree.

"And you're saying I have one of those?" said Dean.

"Yup. It's one that has been repeated each reset from what I understand, but half the time you're too stubborn to admit to it," said Bree.

"Who is it?" asked Sam.

"I'll tell you later, trust me, it will make you laugh," said Bree.

* * *

Bree changed into Dean to walk with Sam, who was going to investigate another weird death.

"So who is Dean fate-bound to?" asked Sam in the car.

"Castiel," said Bree. Sam stumbled.

"_Cas_ is his fate-bond?" said Sam.

"Like I said, he was too stubborn to see it himself. Castiel found Dean in fifteen minutes after he tortured his sixty-sixth soul in hell. The only way he could have done that is if they had a fate-bond and heaven noticed it, or if the angels had been in hell looking for him. Why don't you ask Castiel why he had been the one to bring Dean up from hell and not someone else," said Bree.

"But Dean isn't gay!" said Sam.

"Who said you had to be gay? Fate-bonds don't care about gender, only about compatibility. Besides, I'm fairly sure Dean is bi considering he was checking out Loki's ass on the way out of that warehouse anyway," said Bree.

"Dean was checking out..." said Sam in disbelief.

"Try watching him when Cas is around and not hiding under the trench coat."

"But Cas never takes off that coat!" said Sam.

"I plan to swipe it later," said Bree grinning.

"You've set them up before haven't you?" said Sam suspiciously when they exited the building.

"Hell yes I did! Locked their asses in a panic room for a week with food and shower! I even doused Dean through the turkey with low-level lust potions just so he could claim that it was the potion that made him jump Cas!" said Bree.

"Low-level lust potions?" said Sam.

"Low-levels are more of a pick-me-up for guys and the occasional girl. They're easy to ignore but they're like alcohol in that they lower certain inhibitions to the point where you just don't care about the consequences anymore. Much less dangerous than love potions to be honest."

"How are lust potions less dangerous than love?" asked Sam.

"Love potions create fake love and are the equivalent of date rape drugs if you use a strong enough potency. Lust potions can be ignored easily if you have enough control, like say if you were locked in a room with a guy and you happened to be straight, or a girl if you happened to be gay. If Dean really were straight, he wouldn't be effected when locked in the room with Cas. Considering the smell that room had when we let them out, it was pretty damn obvious that Dean had jumped Cas," said Bree.

"And if you're bi?" asked Sam.

"Then it's a toss-up on whether or not you find the other person to your liking. If you dislike them as a person strongly enough then the potions won't be nearly as effective."

They stopped long enough to hear the cause of death, which only confirmed it for Bree, not that he had any doubts.

Sam noticed a demon leaving the building and Bree did a rather interesting maneuver that landed his blade in the demon's gut, killing him instantly. Sam stared at the blood before Bree snapped his fingers, removing it from sight.

"Why aren't you a hunter?" Sam asked, once his breathing was back to normal.

"Who said I'm not? The Monkey Magic Hotline is on a special cell phone and all the information I find relevant or good lands on a file in my computer. I'm always on the move, hunting things out of boredom. How did you think my service landed on the hunter's list of people to call for help so quickly?" asked Bree.

"But the date said right after our dad died!" said Sam.

Bree snorted.

"Time travel is possible for angels, and I'm enough of one to pull it off. That was just to catch your attention," said Bree.

"Let's head back to the hotel," said Sam. Bree teleported them there, without the noise.

* * *

"What's in the briefcase?" asked Dean.

"Human soul, probably," said Bree.

Cas appeared after they opened it, burgers in hand. Bree was almost tempted to dose them with lust potions so he and Dean could get that tension out of the way once and for all.

Dean looked at Cas oddly for a moment.

"Where's your coat?" asked Dean.

"It went missing without warning while I procured some red meat," said Cas calmly.

Dean noticed Sam looking at him funny and said "What?"

"Not telling," said Sam. Seemed Bree wasn't joking about his brother being bi after all.

"I'll stay with Sam while you go with Cas," said Bree.

"If anything happens to my brother, you're a dead man," said Dean.

"Yeah, yeah...go be with your pretty boy angel while I hold down the fort," snorted Bree.

* * *

Sam was almost to the point of begging when the demons came to grab him. Bree snarled and killed them before he vanished the bodies. He didn't want to tempt Sam any further.

"You know you could have learned how to control that damn power of yours without resorting to demon's blood, idjit!" said Bree.

"What?"

"You could have learned to exorcise demons without demon's blood a long time ago if you hadn't been so damn mopey without Dean for a few months! Ruby never bothered to give you the real method of learning because she wanted you hopped up on demon's blood," said Bree.

"Can you show me?" asked Sam. He felt useless without that power.

"I can travel with you two for a while and give you the proper method to do it, but right now we need to help Dean. I can keep your addiction at bay long enough to defeat Famine, but I really hate doing this," said Bree.

"What are you..." said Sam before Bree cut his arm and put it in a plastic cup.

"Don't bitch about it, just drink it. Angel's blood, even if it's only partial, is more than enough to negate the effects of demon's blood and it's not as addicting. Plus it will prove to your idjit brother that I'm not a demon," said Bree as an afterthought.

Sam looked at the cup dubiously, before he downed it in a single gulp. His eyes widened in shock when he realized that Bree wasn't joking. If he really were a demon he would have felt a power boost by now.

"I can't feel my addiction," said Sam.

"Because you just sated it, even temporarily. All that bitch did was give you 'blood addiction'. She made you a partial vampire, only you were set to demon's blood instead of human. Angel blood is the perfect counter to it," said Bree.

"Is there any way to cure it?" asked Sam.

"I might have a temporary method, but I don't know about a permanent. Let's go save Dean," said Bree.

* * *

"Sam!" cried Dean.

Bree snuck behind Famine and cut off his hand. The ring clattered to the floor and Famine vanished.

"Sam, are you...is that blood I smell?" asked Dean.

"I gave him some of mine. Angel's blood, even if it is diluted, can counter 'blood addiction', which is what Sam has. And it's not as addicting as demon's blood. I might have a trick to keeping Sam from falling off the wagon, though it will take a bit to get ready," said Bree.

"Is he telling the truth?" asked Dean to Cas.

"I have no idea. No human has ever taken angel's blood as a cure to demons," said Castiel.

"We used it in my time line. It seemed to keep Sam from falling off the wagon," said Bree.

* * *

A week later Bree appeared and dropped off a box of what appeared to be suckers.

"What are these?" asked Dean, reaching for one.

"Blood pops, filled with angel's blood instead of humans. It's considered a joke treat to humans and candy to vampires who don't feel like hunting. The next time Sam comes near demon's blood, all he has to do is pop one of these into his mouth and wait for the sugar to fade and he'll have angel's blood in him. Think of it like nicotine gums for smokers."

"What?" said Dean.

"Here Sam try one," said Bree as he pulled out a jar.

"Is that..." said Sam cautiously.

"Demon's blood, yes. It's to show your brother this actually works," said Bree.

"I'm calling Cas to confirm it," said Dean.

"Go for it."

"Dean what... Why do you have a jar of demon's blood near Sam?" asked Castiel looking at Bree.

"Proving that the blood pops work," said Bree.

Castiel picked on up, and his eyebrows nearly shot to his hair.

"Where did you get this?" he asked.

"I made them. The trick is getting the blood to stay without mingling with the candy," said Bree.

"What's wrong with it?" asked Dean.

"This blood is in the class of an arch angel at the very least. Getting a hold of this should be nearly impossible," said Castiel.

"Not impossible, just a little painful," said Bree, showing his cut.

"Dude, you're in the same class as an arch angel?"

"No, but I have the _blood_ of one in me."

"Which one?" asked Sam.

"Gabriel. And before you ask, this was because of Fate's meddling in _my_ time line and not this one. So pop in a pop and let's test it out!" said Bree impatiently.

Sam took one of the suckers out and popped it in his mouth. A few minutes later Bree undid the seal on the jar of blood and Sam didn't even look at it once. To further prove his point, Bree even handed it to Sam, who's breathing didn't even change.

"It appears that we've found a solution to your brother's addiction," said Castiel.

Dean couldn't help the look of relief he had on his face.

"How much do we owe for this?"

"Nothing. You'll understand why when I finally tell you my full name," said Bree before he vanished, taking the demon's blood with him.


	4. Canon Alternate, No Episode

_**Canon Universe, no episode**_

Sam dialed Bree, wondering when he had the chance to add his number to the contact list of his phone.

"_What's up Sammy?"_

"Were you serious about those lessons?" he asked, wondering how Bree knew it was him without looking up.

"_You want to get started now? How does Dean feel about this?"_

"I told him I could deal with demons without demon's blood and he agreed reluctantly. Castiel seemed surprised I could do that without the amplifier," admitted Sam.

"_And the blood pops?"_

"Still sober. I think Dean trusts you because of it," said Sam.

"_Just to warn you, if I do come over I might just get into a verbal sparring match with your brother."_

"As long as it doesn't come to blows I'm fine with that."

"_...You want me to come by T.A.R.D.I.S. or just come over?"_

"Dude, T.A.R.D.I.S.! How often do you get to see one that actually _works_?"

Bree laughed, and a few minutes later there was a replica of the T.A.R.D.I.S. in the room where no one would bump into it.

Bree popped out with a grin on his face.

"Took me ages, but I was finally able to duplicate the Doctor's ship. Want to come have a look?" grinned Bree.

Sam was off the bed and in the box before the phone dropped on the bed.

* * *

"Sammy? What in the hell?" said Dean, seeing the giant blue box in the room.

He tentatively knocked on the door, and out popped Sam. He could see light from past his brother.

"Hey Dean."

"Sammy, what the hell?" asked Dean.

"Bring him in Sammy! We need another for poker anyway!" came Bree's voice. Sam stepped aside and Dean looked in and blinked.

"What in the hell?"

"Welcome to the T.A.R.D.I.S. or Time And Relative Dimensions In Space. Also called Bree's crib of love~" said Bree smirking.

"Why?" asked Dean, pinching his nose.

"Why not? It's not like there weren't any spells to make my own, plus now I never have to pay for a room. I just park it and I can stroll about town," smirked Bree.

There was a ringing sound from the console, and Bree picked it up.

"Yo, Monkey here! Hellhounds? Ouch. Here's the exorcism I've found works like a charm to dispel them," said Bree. He gave it off a list on his computer, and hung up.

"Wait, this is your house?"

"It was a bitch to hook this all up, but now I never have to worry about angels, demons or ghosts. My own little clubhouse. Plus it has this beer room that never runs out next to a room with all sorts of DVDs," said Bree.

"Lead on," said Dean. He needed a drink anyway. He took one look at the collection of DVDs and locked the door. Sam rolled his eyes knowingly.

"And that takes care of Dean," said Bree with a smirk.

"So back to our lessons then?" asked Sam.

Bree grinned and they sat down in the zen garden Bree had in there. Sam would be the first to admit it put him at peace with himself.

"Okay Sam, remember, in and out."

Sam sat in a comfortable position and began the breathing exercises Bree had taught him. He found it easier to 'see' his power when he did this.

As Bree's voice faded away, Sam didn't even notice Cas appearing since he could no longer sense Dean.

"Hello Cas. If you want to find Dean he's on the hall to the left," said Bree.

Cas gave him a look.

"I know you two are fate-bonded, so don't be ashamed. I mean it's not like a child would come of the pairing," said Bree.

"It's against Heaven's law," said Cas.

"It's frowned upon, but not forbidden. No one would fault you if you acted on your urges to ravish Dean. And if push came to shove, you can tell Micheal the Walker drugged you."

Castiel looked longingly at the door where Dean's familiar presence came from.

"Go on Cas. The lust potion I doused half those beers with should have kicked in, and don't think we didn't see Dean staring at your ass when you didn't have that coat hiding it."

Cas was gone before he finished that sentence, and Bree shot a silencing charm at the area where Dean was. He checked on Sam and found he was a bit too deep into his meditation.

"Sam, when I count to ten, you are going to open your eyes and look at me."

"One...two...three...four...five...six...seven...eight...nine...ten... Sam, open your eyes."

Sam's eyes opened to reveal an expanse of white. It seemed the angel's blood was doing the other thing Bree had experienced with his Sam. It was slowly pushing his natural psychic powers back to where they were supposed to be instead of the channels that Ruby had forced them to go down.

"Can you hear me Sammy?"

"_I can hear you. What's going on?"_ asked Sam. His voice sounded odd.

"One of the side effects of angel's blood is that it erases any presence of demons in the body. Right now your powers are being put where they were supposed to go and not where Ruby forced them to go. I want you to feel your power, can you?"

"_I feel warm. Like a blanket on a cold day,"_ said Sam.

"That would be your natural powers. Memorize the feeling. Can you do that for me?"

Sam closed his eyes and concentrated on the feeling he was in. he needed to be able to remember it when he needed to.

When his breathing evened out, Bree looked in on him again.

"Sam, listen to the sound of my voice. The true way to use your powers isn't focus, but will. When you exorcise demons, you are _willing_ them out of the body. You are matching your will against that of the demon, and telling them that _they do not belong here._ Since angels are stronger than most demons, you will be unable to pull the same stunt with them. Do you understand me?"

"Yes."

"Now, when you awake, we'll be training your powers the correct way, instead of jumping into demon exorcisms. It will be slow and you may have to invest in a lot of tissues and a few blood replenishers, but it will be worth it."

"I understand."

"And if you ever feel the need to jump past our lessons back into your old behavior I want you to call me immediately. Is that clear? You and Dean are stronger as a team than you will ever be apart," said Bree.

Sam slowly woke up from his trance and looked at Bree.

"How do you feel?"

"Better. More at peace."

"Good. Demon's blood has a nasty side effect of increasing testosterone to the point where you become more violent than normal. Angel's blood is a good counter agent, but near impossible to get your hands on."

"You mean all my rage is because of demon's blood?" asked Sam.

"Think of it this way. Every time you take demon's blood, it increases the adrenaline and testosterone in your brain, making you like some biker in a bar fight. You get stronger because of the adrenaline but the testosterone stays present until you can get it out."

"Adrenaline would cause my focus to shoot up, allowing me to use my powers," said Sam.

"Exactly. What I am going to do in order to reverse that rather dangerous trigger is teach you to meditate and give you counseling sessions where you can vent. That should finish off what the angel blood has started, which was take the edge off the addiction."

"Did this help your Sam?"

"Yes it did. He had a great deal to vent, and he said it helped to get it out without having to worry about being locked up or hurting someone. When you have trouble sitting still, we'll move on to movement meditation, where you practice stances while you focus inward. It's a great way to learn how to meditate without having to worry about being jittery," said Bree.

"Sounds like you have experience."

"Learned five martial arts that way, and it helps to learn languages when you're really bored," replied Bree instantly.

"How many do you know?"

"I know fifteen martial arts, and I lost count on the language front. I started learning Latin when I was seven and a half and didn't stop learning new languages because I grew bored easily. I'm a natural linguist."

It was how he picked up Enochian so damn fast. He was used to translating languages.

"Have you seen Dean? I thought I heard someone come in."

"Cas showed up because he couldn't feel Dean and I silenced the room hours ago. Last time I tried to get Dean to open up, he had to get drunk off his ass to do it," said Bree flatly.

"You mean Castiel and Dean are..."

"Dean probably jumped him once those potions took effect, and if anyone asks Cas, I'm to blame. He's the only angel other than Gabriel allowed in here."

* * *

A few hours, long after Sam took Bree on his offer for his own room to design (where he quickly mastered picking things up with his mind) Dean came out looking exhausted.

"Better?" asked Bree innocently.

"You sent Cas in there and I know you did something to the beer," said Dean.

"Lust potions. Just lowered your inhibitions to jump your pretty boy angel," said Bree.

"And Sammy?"

"Fine...probably sleeping off lesson one, but he'll live. By the way, next time Sammy uses his powers and blood starts seeping from his nose, just ignore it. That just means his brain is learning to handle the strain of his natural ability. Eventually it will stop altogether."

Dean looked tired.

"Believe me about fate-bonds now?"

"I need food."

"Shower first, food after. I'll make you something to eat, so get clean. By the way, I'm making that your room. This whole place was based off the concept of a panic room, so demons will never get in, and only the angels keyed to the place would be able to find it, let alone break in."

"And the box?"

"Even if it were destroyed, it was just a partial anchor. It would reappear to the primary anchor."

"Where's the primary anchor?"

Bree innocently pointed at the trunk sitting in the corner.

"The T.A.R.D.I.S. gets destroyed, I find the nearest ley line and kick that out of the door. One charm and the thing pops open, allowing us to escape. Essentially we're in a pocket dimension that's inside the trunk...that box was just a door that leads outside without drawing suspicion. It's actually a doppelganger of the real one."

It had been a real bitch to work this out, but totally worth it as it meant he wouldn't have to keep buying a new house each reset as long as the trunk was around his wrist.

He deserved his own place dammit!

Once Dean came out of the shower (a water rune tied to a heat rune that activated upon contact with skin and a vanishing charm that got rid of the water and whatever else was in there as long as it touched the underside of the plate Dean stood on) and ate, he went to snuggle up to Cas, as the room was set to clean up after them once one of them left it.

Bree didn't like messy rooms. Let alone cleaning up after Dean and Cas after they had been together.


	5. Canon Alternate, Dead Men Don't Wear

_**Canon Universe, "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid"**_

Dean, Sam and Bree (who was traveling with them out of boredom with his little 'house' on his bracelet) were heading to Bobby's town in Sioux Falls to check on a story where the dead killed the living.

Bree took one step out of the Impala and reared back as if struck by something, or had smelled something foul.

"What's up?" asked Dean.

"This town reeks of Necromancy. Someone's been raising the dead," said Bree coldly. Dean and Sam looked at him oddly...usually he was a cheerful, if insane person. Now he looked rather like an angel or Castiel when he was pissed.

"How do you know it was necromancy?"

"My angel side might be dominant, but what's left of my human heritage is known as the Master of Death. Trust me, I can sense death magic in a heartbeat. And right now there's a shit load of it in the air over the town. Not of human origin, and it has the taint of demon without it actually being demonic."

Dean and Sam were about to go in posing as FBI, but Bree stopped them.

"Hold on while I trick Bobby into answering," said Bree.

"What?"

"He's not answering either of you, but he'll pick up those phones with labels on them. If he won't answer you the normal way we'll just trick him."

"And since he's never actually _heard_ your voice enough to recognize it..." said Sam, getting the idea.

Bree patiently called Bobby's "FBI" phone and waited. Sure enough, Bobby was there.

"Bobby Singer, are you aware that this town reeks of Death? Or that your wife will turn on you in less than a week?" said Bree flatly.

"_Who is this?"_ demanded Bobby.

"You'll find out out soon enough idjit!" said Bree angrily. Last time he had spent days sick to his stomach from this shit and had ended up in heaven because Gabriel had been forced to break a Grace Vial. He had developed a tolerance but his patience dropped like a stone.

* * *

"Dammit Bobby, why didn't you call us?" demanded Dean.

"Because he wanted to believe it was her. Her body will begin to turn in four more days at least, and by that time the rest will have started. I won't force you to kill your wife early Bobby, but at least allow me to insure she is never used like this again," said Bree.

"Why should I trust you?" demanded Bobby, though he was highly tempted to agree to it.

Bree did something neither Winchester had seen before. He unleashed his wings.

"Because I can make sure that demons will never be able to force your wife Karen from her place in heaven, even if I have to sacrifice a Grace Vial to do it. It's cruel to her and to you to keep bringing her shadow back, and I plan to shoot Lucifer in the balls for forcing Death to do it. He hates necromancy even more than I do," said Bree.

"Death was forced by Lucifer?" asked Sam.

"Death is the oldest being in existence, and he exists to keep a balance. He would never use necromancy unless he was forced to do by someone else, in this case Lucifer who controls the horsemen. None of them want to be told what to do, but they put up with it because they didn't like being stuck in the pit all the time. Your wife and all the others were brought back because they wanted to kill you Bobby," said Bree.

Bobby looked old, older than the brothers had ever seen at this announcement.

"You swear she'll never be used like this again?"

"Her soul will be at peace in heaven, and if she ever does show up it will be a fake," promised Bree.

Karen had been listening the whole time.

"What do I need to do?" she asked.

"When the turning starts, I'll be with Bobby and take your soul directly to heaven. I'll place a lock on it there so demons can't use you to kill Bobby ever again, and this time your passing will be more peaceful instead of a bullet to the head," promised Bree.

"You remembered?" said Bobby.

"I remember everything, including the last time I was raised. I didn't want you to know," she admitted.

"She can stay until the turning. Then I have to take her to heaven," said Bree.

"Thank you. Who the hell are you anyway?"

Bree grinned and did a perfect recreation of his hotline voice.

"You're Monkey Magic?"

"I'm a research monkey who uses magic. Do I really need to explain more?"

"What's your real name?" asked Bobby.

"Everyone calls me Bree for short. You sure you want to know my full name since I 'killed' my original?"

Every hunter nodded.

"It's Gabriel. Gabriel Winchester. Just to be clear though, you two idjits adopted me into the family, unlike Adam."

* * *

Bree was by Bobby's side the entire time Karen was turning. When she was about to attack Bobby, Bree placed his hand on her soul and pulled it out. He said something in Enochian and vanished.

Bobby cried at the loss of his wife, though at least this time he knew she would be safe in heaven.

He managed to get to the panic room where he bolted the door before the other undead came after him, as Bree had warned him earlier that they would seek him out. It took Dean and Sam an hour to put down the lot.

Bree came back shortly after with good news at least.

"I put Karen with my birth parents from this world. She'll be safer there than anywhere near her own slice of heaven until Bobby comes to her. The only way they would be able to find her now is if they looked for the 'parents of Gabriel Winchester', and since neither John or Mary are mine they'll have no idea where to look."

"Is she happy?"

"My parents were good people in life, and like Sam my mother died to protect me from a madman. She'll be fine until you pass on and join her and by that time she won't need protecting because you'll be there with her," said Bree.

Bobby looked relieved at that news.

"Now, I do believe we all need a very strong drink...unless you would like to visit Castiel for a while Dean?" said Bree with an evil smirk.

Bobby looked at Sam who was trying not to laugh.

"Drink first, then I'll consider your suggestion," said Dean flatly. He had long since come to terms with the fate-bond.

Dean was horrified when Bree started singing an Irish song while dead drunk. He _hated_ folk music!

Sam and Bobby just looked like they wanted to laugh.

Eventually they went to bed, Bree claiming the panic room out of habit.

"Why do I get the feeling I'll be seeing that idjit angel-kid a lot more from know on?" asked Bobby to Sam.

"Because he's been around you enough before to have picked up your way of saying idiot," said Sam.

* * *

Bree woke up to hear the ironic parody of the song "Hero" to answer his phone.

"What do you want demon?"

"_Tell the Winchester morons I have the Colt and I'll melt it down unless they agree to unload it in Lucifer's face,"_ said Crowley. The only reason he knew Crowley was because the demon had introduced himself while he was out getting some proper British tea in this time line. Unlike the rest of the demons Bree had encountered, he was more interested in _helping_ the Walker kill Lucifer.

That was the only reason he had given Bree his phone number. He seemed to find Bree's choice in ringtones rather amusing.

"Crowley, I have a hang over and that Colt isn't even worth shit against Lucifer. The damn thing isn't strong enough...besides all it has is a bunch of spells to let you aim straight and actually _hit_ the thing you're shooting at!"

"_What?"_

"I looked at the Colt once the see what the big deal about it and found that someone's been making a bunch of hype about the gun and not the bullets. Try looking at what each bullet was made with and call me back!" said Bree flatly, wincing.

Crowley hung up and Bree went to find a hangover remedy. Bobby was already up, and his eyebrow raised when heard the song "Villain" playing from Bree's pocket.

"I told you dammit, the Colt wouldn't be worth shit against Lucifer! Yes I checked before, and all it did was piss him off! ...I already know about the horsemen's rings, who did you think tipped off the idiot brothers? You owe me chocolate for this Crowley!"

Bree covered his eyes to shut out the light, and accepted the coffee...spiked with Holy Water of course after Bobby heard that last bit.

"Gah! Hot, hot, hot!" he cried before rummaging for pain reliever.

"How do you know Crowley?"

"He ran into me and said point blank he was interested in a deal to get rid of Lucifer. I told him to fuck off, and then he told me why he didn't plan on killing me for that comment. So long as he isn't exposed helping us and we off Lucifer or seal him away in a cage he can never break free from, he gets to be King of Hell. In exchange he'll owe us one...which would be more than enough to free John Winchester from hell's influence and send him to heaven."

"John's in hell?" said Bobby.

"He made a demon deal, and they hate him with a passion. About the only thing that would free him is angelic influence or whoever rules Hell letting him out."

Bree downed the rest of the coffee and then headed off. He had established a place at Bobby's by freeing his wife from any new demonic influence and keeping her safe in heaven. Now he needed to expand his own knowledge since he had long since read any books Bobby had in his house.


	6. Canon Alternate No Episode

_**Canon Universe, no episode...but it does have a lot of pranks**_

"DAMMIT BREE, KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY PHONE!" yelled Dean after his phone went off after Sammy called him. Sam was asking what was wrong.

Bree cackled from inside his little box, which Dean had placed a sign over saying "Bree's Lair" as a joke yesterday which Bree had either not noticed or didn't care about.

He still had trouble believing that Bree had an entire house inside a giant blue box with a little light thing on top of it. At the very least they never had to rent another room on the highway again.

Sam came back five minutes later looking very confused...until someone rang Dean (Bobby) and he heard the song 'Macho Man' playing on Dean's phone. Suddenly the yell made sense.

Someone called Sam's and his eyebrows went up in shock as the song 'Barbie Girl' started playing.

"I am going to kill him!" said Dean.

"Why?"

"Did you _hear_ that ringtone? He's done it with everyone on speed dial!"

"Which one is mine?" asked Sam.

Dean refused to speak of it but Sam called Dean. The song that played was the _Doctor Who_ theme song.

Sam blinked.

"What's so bad about that?"

"I'm not a damn nerd like you!" said Dean.

"Speaking of nerds, Sam could you come in here for a minute?" said Bree with a mischievous wink.

Sam went in, and five seconds later Dean was cursing after Bree tossed a scroll at his head and the box in the room vanished.

He unwrapped it to find:

"_Dean,_

_Figured Sam could use some cheering up after his nightmare last night so I'm kidnapping him for the day. Have fun with your free time, we'll be back by morning and I'll kidnap you next._

_Bree._

_P.S. I only changed ten of your contacts, have fun searching which ones!"_

"DAMN YOU BREE!"

While he was glad Bree was doing something to cheer Sam up, he just wished that Bree hadn't pranked him before he did it. Then he saw the state of the Impala's interior.

It looked like some horror from the sixties, complete with disco ball! Dean growled.

* * *

"Bree, is this what I think it is?" said Sam, his eyes alight.

"If you're asking did I just kidnap you and drag you to _Who Con,_ then the answer is a most definite yes, yes I did. I have David Tennant's outfit and everything you would need to cosplay at him. Now, if you excuse me I'm going to change into a Weeping Angel."

Sam was gone and into his costume within five minutes. He loved Doctor Who!

"Dude, nice costume!" said another fan who looked like the tenth Doctor.

Another dressed as Matt Smith grinned and gave Sam a thumbs up.

"_Exterminate, Exterminate!" _said Bree walking up in his weeping angel costume. The two convention guys looked at him and gave him two thumbs up for his flawless Dalek impersonation.

Sam and Bree cruised around the stalls, picking up a few items, particularly every season of the Doctor Who series for Sam since he was still on season four of the current one. Bree was happy to pay for it since Sam agreed to a movie marathon once they had a chance.

They had a blast and Sam got to have one night in which the girls weren't falling over him and Dean because of their looks. Though he did have to deal with Bree laughing at him because a girl who was dressed as Rose tried to pick him up.

People kept asking him where he got the realistic sonic screwdriver, to his amusement and he quickly got back at Bree by diverting them to the cambion. Surprisingly Bree had a steady business selling the sonic screwdrivers (the ones intended for muggle distribution anyway) to the fans, since it meant he could make back what he spent on the DVD sets.

Besides, _Who Con_ lasted for a week, and he had paid for all the good stuff anyway for both him and Sam.

"Hey Bree?"

"Yeah Sam?"

"Thanks. I needed something to distract me from this Apocalypse business," said Sam. Spending a week at _Who Con_ with Bree had been relaxing, and he got to unwind for the first time since Jessica died.

"I plan to dump Dean and his baby at a classic muscle car convention and leave him there until it's over. Think he'll forgive me for the prank?"

"Probably. You know Dean loves cars."

"And he needs a few days off every once and a while too. ...Hey look, a wizard! I've got to go say hi!" said Bree grinning. He went up to the obvious magical and wasn't surprised that the man was there to keep an eye out for magical sonic screwdrivers. The American Ministry both hated and loved sci-fi conventions, especially popular ones.

They loved them because they tended to help magicals create new spells and ideas, but they hated them because it was damn near impossible to catch muggle abuse.

"So how do you think Dean is doing?" asked Sam after Bree came back.

"He's with Castiel who's disguised as you. Said he'll meet us at Bobby's...I didn't bother to ask what he planned to do with five states between here and Bobby's house," said Bree. Sam took the hint and grinned.

"It's about damn time Dean found someone who wouldn't hurt him."

"More like it's about time he came out of the damn closet," said Bree. Sam snickered.

* * *

Bree and Sam had great pleasure dumping water on both Castiel and Dean when they returned, since Bree had come in silently. Dean woke up with a shout and Cas didn't look too happy either.

"What the hell?"

"Wakey wakey princess!" cackled Bree while Sam laughed beside him.

"Screw you."

"Sorry, looks like you'll have to ask Cas for that! Besides, I have never screwed someone, but I have been screwed over plenty of times," said Bree.

Dean looked at him suspiciously.

"You can't mean to tell me you've never been laid _once_ in your entire life."

"Not even a hint of it, aside from hugs or kissing," said Bree.

"We are getting you laid. You too Sammy, since you went to a nerd convention for a week."

Sam looked away.

"Sammy here managed to pick up _four_ different nerd hotties, and only one left without doing anything."

He neglected to add most of them were dressed as either Rose, Amy Pond, or a very credible Martha Jones. The first girl declined to do anything because she found someone more interesting.

"Sammy, you dog!" said Dean pleased.

"So how was traveling with your boy-toy?" asked Bree.

"Shaddup virgin!" said Dean.

"Grease Monkey!"

"Nerd!"

"Man-whore!"

"Wimp!"

"Adrenaline junkie!"

"Geek!"

"Ass!"

"Bitch!"

"Jerk!"

Sammy couldn't help his comment next.

"Girls, you're both pretty, now shut your traps."

Dean and Bree both stuck their tongue out at Sam, which sparked this...

"Dean, put that tongue away because I really don't want to think of where _that_ thing has been."

Bree snickered.

A few days later he kidnapped Dean and his car and dropped them at the annual muscle cars convention that lasted for five days and enough cash that Dean could get some things for the Impala. He drove back to Bobby's looking much happier than he had been in a long time, because he got to see some very cool cars and have people gush over his baby.

Of course he immediately got into a prank war with Bree for grabbing him like that.

* * *

Dean's first act was to unscrew the lid off the salt shaker. Bree handed it to Bobby who promptly cussed Dean out for ruining his eggs.

And with that, chaos reigned among the Winchesters.

Bree retaliated by having a few non-poisonous snakes slither into Dean's bed. Sam promptly taped his brother screaming bloody murder while Bree rescued the 'poor snakes that were corrupted by Dean's dirty mind', to Sam's amusement.

Dean retaliated by stealing Bree's holly wand, which he thought was the source of his magic.

Bree decides to remind him that yes, he is the Trickster's son, no matter _how_ that one happened, and promptly puts Dean in an oh-so-familiar illusion of _Dr. Sexy, M.D._, only this time he puts it in Dean's mind making him look like a lunatic in the town they were in. Sam narrowly manages to keep Dean out of the nuthouse by claiming he had been doing a bet.

Things escalate from there.

Dean manages to paint Bree's T.A.R.D.I.S. bright pink, to his disgust.

Bree puts beef bullion cubes in the hotel shower a few minutes before Dean goes in.

Dean forces Bree into a dress, only to find out that Bree isn't that embarrassed because of the British magical's idea of fashion, I/E robes.

Bree promptly forces Dean to speak nothing but Latin for a full day...and dyes his hair green while he slept. Sam still didn't know how Bree managed that one, because he used Kool-Aid that lasted for a week.

It quickly gets worse as Dean enlists Castiel's help to leave Bree stranded for three days...only to get a card in the mail from Japan sent to Bobby's house.

It wasn't until Bree brought in a very familiar trickster that Dean realizes painfully that he wouldn't win against Bree...because they tag teamed against both Dean, Sam and Castiel for an entire week.

It finally ends when Dean unknowingly sits on a whoopie cushion disillusioned to match the Impala's interior that is filled with stink pellets.

It takes three days before that smell leaves the Impala. By which time Dean has declared a truce grudgingly to Bree.


	7. Canon Alternate, 99 Problems

_**Canon Universe, **_**end of ****_Dark Side of the Moon _and _99 Problems_**

Castiel looked devastated to have what Bree told them confirmed. Dean just looked pissed that god didn't care enough to help.

"I told you. God can't help because it would interfere with his own rules. As I recall, one of heaven's rules is _no direct intervention_ right Cas?"

"It is," Castiel reluctantly admitted.

"Interfering with the apocalypse would be a direct interference...it's why the world was destroyed repeatedly until Fate got pissed off and decided to send me here. There's _direct_ interference, which is what you want Castiel, then there's _indirect_ interference which is what I'm classed as."

"What's the difference?" asked Sam.

"Direct interference...in other words God, Fate or an unchained Death kills Lucifer and Micheal. However that goes against God's mandate that neither heaven nor hell would interfere with human matters, which is what the end of the world is classed as since it happens on Earth and it is possible for humans to stop it themselves."

Castiel looked a bit upset at the reminder.

"Then there's indirect interference, in which one of the big three sends someone in their place to do their work for them. In other words, they get someone with powers to 'fix' things and restore the balance between heaven and hell. Usually it's god or fate that does the calling. Generally those chosen are given extra powers and are called the Walking Man. Walking Men can act without worry of heaven or hell getting in the way, at least until their task is complete...then they're generally screwed because they pissed people off."

"So why haven't you been helping then?" asked Dean.

"I am. I'm helping the epicenter of this mess to clean up after themselves by allying myself with you. Think about it. I'm an angel cambion who hasn't even mastered how to use their Grace yet or even stopped this in my own time. How the hell am I supposed to stop this mess if I don't learn on my own? I have one hundred and thirty-four more repeats until I get back to my alternate universe."

"A hundred thirty-four? The worlds been ruined 134 times?" said Dean in shock.

"After you two didn't get all the information you needed? Yes. This time around you're getting that damn info and setting things right. Then I'll figure out how to go through the next one and the next until I get home. I'm going to be cleaning up this mess for a while."

That was the feeling he got anyway. 134 repeats...134 different messes to clean up. It was the only explanation for why he had been thrown back so far.

Dean looked irritable at having Bree's warning confirmed. He was so annoyed he didn't even want his amulet anymore. Instead he looked at Bree and handed it to him.

"Keep it," he said.

"This is really familiar," said Bree dryly.

"Why?"

Bree pulled out a thin cord and on it was the exact same amulet.

"Same damn scenario. Last time you got a hold of God and he told you to quit looking for him, you give me the amulet saying that you don't care anymore. From what I recall after this we go to a town where demons are running amok and find the Whore of Babylon. It was after that Castiel told me about the Walkers that have appeared over the years. That was the first time I revealed what Cas called my 'angel name' which the humans will go by."

Castiel finally took an interest in what Bree was saying.

"What?"

"Well I couldn't control my Grace and you asked why I called myself Kibeth..."

"Kibeth, the bell that belongs to the Walker in the _Abhorsen_ series," said Sam.

Bree held up a bell that had obscure symbols woven into it, and cast of blessed metal. It had a yew handle that was polished to a finish.

"You're kidding...you made your own set of Bells?" said Sam.

"Actually I had them custom ordered by the same guys who made my sonic screwdriver. At least after that mess when I banished Zachariah the asshole into heaven until he learned some manners. Idiot actually removed his Grace just to kill me, so I took Dad's blade and stabbed it through the brain."

"Good," said Dean.

"Yeah. But I always keep the amulet with the Grace Vials...including..." said Bree grinning as he pulled out the biggest vial on the chain.

"Is that..." said Castiel.

"Lucifer's Grace? Yup."

Castiel looked at Bree with a new light.

"You're the one. The innocent who fell into the pit and found that which the first to fall had lost," said Castiel.

"Bingo! Fate must have been pissed that particular prophecy wasn't completed and finally found the winning recipe to have it filled finally," said Bree.

"What prophecy?" asked Sam.

"So it shall be that a pure soul shall descend into Hell to spare the life of a condemned man, dragging the damned down with him. And he shall ascend into courts most high under the power taken back from he who was first to fall...," said Castiel, quoting the prophecy.

"And what does that mean?"

"I killed Lilith, sparing Sam the fate of starting the apocalypse and was caught in the seal she created. While I fell into hell, I dragged the man who murdered my mother down with me because he had somehow managed to attach a piece of his soul in my head...which I absorbed his powers. For two months above I searched Hell and found six Vials full of an Angel's Grace which is the source of their powers...including Lucifer's. And once that was done I achieved what is known as a partial ascension, awakening to my full angelic powers and getting a double pair of wings. I can also see any angel's true form without going blind. What's left of my human form became the Master of Death, who holds the stone from Death's ring."

"What exactly does that mean anyway?" asked Dean.

"Bree was doomed to become the Walker the moment that prophecy was completed. The only reason Heaven even knows about it is because God told us that anyone who completes it will become a Walking Man who will stop Lucifer once and for all," said Castiel.

"Yeah, and unlike that whole Boy-Who-Lived crap, I actually have a support team and a family who gives a damn about what happens to me. I would rather be a force of Fate cleaning up after you two than being stuck in England with a damn fan girl as my wife and my surrogate sister stuck in a loveless marriage to a dullard."

Castiel looked at him in shock.

"Harry Potter. That's your original name isn't it? That's how you knew about the Hallows!"

"My _name,"_ Bree stressed angrily, "is Gabriel Winchester. Harry Potter died when I realized he would never live in peace thanks to that damn war. At least now I don't have to keep half and eye out for people wanting to steal the Deathly Hallows from me."

He looked at Sam and Dean.

"You have two options. Either say yes to Lucy and Micheal...or find the other two horsemen and have Cass take you to England to Godric's Hallow and explain to this world's Harry Potter why you need the Resurrection Stone. Then Lucifer gets sealed for good, and he won't be entirely immortal anymore," said Bree before he vanished.

"We are seriously boned," said Dean.

"Can you take us to this Godric's Hallow to find Potter?" asked Sam.

"Not until you find Death's Ring. That would be the only chance I could see for you to convince him to part with it," said Castiel.

* * *

Sam and Dean drove like hell in a town with high demon activity. Like Bree had said, they found a town where demons were running amok. They heard someone chanting Enochian and knew that something was very wrong indeed.

Once they were inside the church, Sam called Bree.

"Bree...Yeah, we're in that town you told us about. What were they saying anyway? ...You're joking right?" asked Sam.

"What?" asked Dean.

Sam put his phone closer to Dean so he could hear.

"_I said that their supposed exorcism is saying and I quote 'You breed with the mouth of a goat.' It's not a very witty thing to say to be honest,"_ said Bree.

"Are you sure?" asked Dean loudly.

"_Dean, I can read and speak Enochian as well as any angel. All that exorcism does it annoy the demons...besides they're being controlled by the Whore of Babylon anyway."_

"How do we find this chick anyway?"

"_She disguises herself as a fake prophet. Also, last time I encountered her she claimed that she could hear the angels speaking to her, which as you know very well Dean is extremely painful if you aren't in tune with them and can drive humans insane. Next time she claims to 'hear' angels, ask if they are speaking to her in dreams or in their true voice. If she says in dreams she might be tempted to use an angel you're familiar with. If she says true voice, then loudly point out that hearing an angel speak in Enochian breaks windows."_

"Either way we'll bust her."

"_If that doesn't work, call me and I'll show up with my wings out to give the townspeople a good scare and a rather unhappy wake-up call."_

"You have wings?" asked Sam.

"_You might get to see them soon if you can't break the Whore's control of the town. Or I'll show them to you at Bobby's. Fair warning Dean, touching an angel's wings is supposed to be very personal from what Cas and Gabriel have told me."_

* * *

Leah the 'Prophet' passed out in the pew.

"Is it another vision?" asked her father.

She nodded, but Dean interrupted.

"Just out of curiosity, do the angels talk to you directly in your dreams or in their true voices?" asked Dean.

"They talk to me in their true voice," said Leah.

"Then why aren't you raving mad yet?" asked Dean.

"What?" asked Leah taken aback.

"An angel can't speak to humans directly without driving them insane. And seeing an angel's true form will blind you. Not to mention the last time I heard an angel speaking to me, it blew out the windows and made the television static as hell," said Dean flatly.

"An angel has spoken to you?" asked the priest.

"He tried, didn't really work out. You see angels can't speak to us without taking human form, usually a willing vessel. And the last person we met who saw an angel in their true form had their eyes burned out," said Dean.

Leah stammered about how she was special, but Dean and Sam weren't buying it.

"You see I find it odd that demons would be interested in such a small town. And angels are against direct interference because God told them it was a bad idea," said Sam.

"Maybe you aren't as special as me," said Leah.

"And maybe you're a fake prophet. See we happen to know someone who speaks Enochian, and he said you're full of crap," said Dean.

"I'm not!"

"Then why does your exorcism actually mean 'You breed with the mouth of a goat'? And your prophecies are too specific to be true," said Sam.

* * *

Sam and Dean were kicked out of town because the people didn't believe them. It was understandable, considering they had just arrived and Leah had been 'protecting' them from demons. So they called in reinforcements.

Bree waited for Leah to have another 'vision' before he made his move.

"_**Whore of Babylon, for trying to turn the innocent into the damned, I condemn you to death,"**_said Bree with a booming voice. His four wings were shining with a simple light charm since he didn't want to use his Grace and his voice was amplified with a Sonorus.

The townspeople stared at Leah with fright as the 'angel' stabbed her in the heart with a Cyprus stake from Babylon. After she was done fizzling where he stabbed her, he told them the simplest methods.

He told them to go back to the basics, I/E the Ten Commandments. If that didn't help their case then they had done something to go to hell anyway. He left the town to see Dean and Sam.

"How did I do?" he asked with a smirk.

"Bree, you make one bad ass angel," said Dean.

"How did you make your wings glow like that?"

"Light charm combined with Sonorus for the voice."

Castiel appeared five minutes later in Dean's car.

"What happened?" he asked.

"We ran into the Whore of Babylon and Bree scared them straight since she was about to condemn a ton of people to hell," said Sam.

"How?"

"I appeared with glowing wings, booming voice and I looked the part most people think of when they imagine angels. All I told them while the bitch died was to go back to basics, as in their precious Ten Commandments," said Bree.

"Probably the least amount of damage you've done to Heaven's reputation," said Castiel sourly.

"Har har," said Bree.


	8. Canon Alternate No Episode, England

_**Canon Universe, no episode**_

"GET BACK HERE MIDGETS!" shouted Dean. His voice was rather high-pitched for him and he looked different at first glance.

Closer inspection would reveal that somehow Bree and Loki had turned him and Sam into females thanks to some carefully timed potions, and that Dean was now on the warpath.

Bree and Loki were cackling while they hid inside the TARDIS. Sam just looked resigned as he knew that this would end eventually. The only thing that would make this even more embarrassing was if...

The sound of wings came from nearby and he, er she sighed.

Trust Cas to feel his bonded's anger and come looking for answers.

"Dean what is...why are you female?" asked Castiel in confusion.

"The Midget duo hit me and Sammy with what they call gender-switching potions. Said it would last a week," growled Dean. He was going to kill them for this...or preferably shoot them both in the ass.

Dean heard Sam's phone go off and half the conversation. Trust Bree to call Bobby with the news. He could even hear Bobby laughing his ass off when he heard what was going on.

Dean finally noted that Cas was staring at him far too intently for his comfort.

"Cas what are you..."

Sam took one look at the scene and vacated the room before the curtains were shut and the door locked. He was so not sticking around to hear the result.

"Hey Samantha we have cards and beer! Want to play poker?" shouted Bree from his area.

"You do realize Dean will kill you for this?" he said.

"Yeah, and? By the time _she_ gets to leave that room we'll be halfway around the world! Care for a trip?" cackled Bree.

Sam sighed...then again maybe he could convince Bree to help him end his prank early.

"Where are we?"

"Britain, just outside Charing Cross Road. Figured you could meet the Master of Death early," said Bree smirking.

"How will I know what he looks like?"

Bree snapped his fingers and became a somewhat short man with black hair that had spiking issues and his familiar emerald green eyes hidden behind a pair of glasses. On his head was a lightning-shaped scar and tired continence.

"This is what I looked like before my partial ascension. That help?"

"A bit, yeah. How do I convince him about Lucifer?"

"Offer to willingly take veritaserum. Three drops of that and you'll be talking in nothing but truth. Or a gryffin quill which won't allow lies to be written."

"What's his name?"

"Harry James Potter. Just tell him point blank why you need the stone and that you would leave him alone after, and he should be willing to at least hear you out. I had a support group once I was eight, so I have no idea if anyone got him out of that house or if Vernon was just as bad as I remember."

In truth he was going to be cruising around Diagon for something to buy. He had rebuilt a good stash of gold in this time line to use, and he planned to use it.

* * *

As it turned out, Bree ran into his alternate self long before Sam did. Harry was having another argument with Ginny (who made Bree shudder at the thought of marrying the fan girl) when he stomped off. Bree casually walked up to him and said "Bad day?"

Harry glanced at him and decided what the hell, why not?

"You don't know the half of it."

"You look like you need a rant buddy. How about a drink away from people?"

"Is it strong?"

"It's the good stuff. Have to kill time till my friend comes back since I dropped him off here to have some fun after I pranked him into being a girl."

"Beats dealing with my pissy wife just because she got another floo call about me abandoning my paperwork for another day. Not like I actually _enjoy_ my job anymore. She won't even let me play with the kids in peace!" bitched Harry.

"Sounds like you need a nice vacation where you can kill things that no one cares about," said Bree. Inwardly he was grinning.

"Yeah, like the paperwork wouldn't be hell for the damages I cause," said Harry, throwing back another shot.

"Tell me, what do you know of hunters?"

"They're a bitch and a half cleaning up after when they run into anything magical," responded Harry immediately.

Bree brought out a laptop and quickly pulled up his site. Harry scrolled through with vague interest, having learned how to use a desktop in primary school.

The more he read, the higher his interest in the career rose.

"How's the paperwork?" he asked finally. Hunters seemed to have a decent life going on, minus a steady paycheck...plus his life had been dead boring for a while now.

"No paperwork at _all_. Aside from having to learn real Latin and a few other odds and ends, it beats being an Auror any day of the week. Plus there's the fact that now Death is active again, you'll probably be visited by the supernatural side anyway."

"What?"

"Lucifer, the devil, was broken free from hell by angels not doing their job right and he set loose the horsemen. War and Famine were set free but Pestilence and Death are still out there. I figured we could at least give you the choice of letting them come to you or taking the fight to them for once. And this time you would be given the information up front instead of working things out on your own," said Bree.

Harry seemed to be seriously considering this.

"Why would they bother me?"

"You're the Master of Death right? Because Death dropped the stone from his ring, the full seal to put Lucifer permanently in his cage is incomplete without the Resurrection stone."

"Why me?" complained Harry.

"Hey, if you do decide to get involved, this time you would have proper back up who don't give a shit about the whole boy-who-lived crap and are running under the same information you are. That's gotta count for something right?"

Harry looked at Bree oddly.

"Being an auror is more dull than I had thought. And I can't stand all that paperwork. Perhaps I do need a vacation from England for a bit."

"Plus you'll be away from Ginny for a while."

Harry thought that last one over and said "Sold. Where do I sign up?"

Bree grinned mischievously.

* * *

Loki stared at Potter who had his own expanded bag much like Hermione's old beaded one.

Ginny had been less than pleased with his sudden vacation away from her and the children, who would be spending time with their grandmother until Harry got back. Molly was under the mistaken impression that Ginny would be with him. He didn't feel like correcting her.

"And who are they?" asked Harry.

"Samuel Winchester, though he goes by Sam. I hit him with a gender switching potion along with his older brother a few hours ago. And this is Loki, yes that Loki, formerly known as Gabriel, the Angel of Judgment. At the moment everyone believes Gabriel to have been killed so I recommend calling him Loki."

"George would love to meet you," said Harry with a snort.

"He already has. Did you know that twins as close as the Weaslys will automatically end up in the same version of heaven when they die? All he has to do is wait for his time and he'll see Fred again," said Loki.

"And what of my parents?" asked Harry.

"They're already in heaven. Saw them both myself when I had to drop off another soul to keep it safe."

"You can go to heaven without dying?"

"Only if you have angel blood or a contractual immortality clause like Sammy here," said Bree.

"Contractual..." started Harry.

"Immortality clause?" finished Sam.

Bree gave Sam a flat look.

"How often have you and Dean died exactly?"

Sam grimaced.

"Good point. We've lost count," said Sam.

"Wait, so I'm not the only person to deal with dying and coming back to life?" said Harry.

"Not only that, Sam and Dean's mother was killed in the same manner as Lily Potter, only instead of a dark wizard it was a demon. So you aren't as alone as you thought," said Bree cheerfully.

Harry looked at Sam thoughtfully.

"You need any help pranking these two idiots?"

"God yes!" said Sam. Maybe now he and Dean could get back at them for all the hell Bree and Loki gave them when they were bored!

* * *

"So let me get this straight. Bree took you to England and somehow convinced the same wizard we were going to have to find to seal Lucifer away...into considering dropping his job to become a hunter?" said Dean.

"To be fair he had been pressured into that role and into his marriage by the magical communities. He can't even enjoy being with his kids anymore because of the stress he's under. Besides, have you seen the amount of paperwork an auror has to do?" said Bree, popping a sucker (not a blood pop, as those were exclusively Sam's) into his mouth.

"Are those blood pops?" asked Harry, seeing the one Sam popped in.

"Yup. Sammy here had a run-in with this demon named Ruby who turned him into a partial vampire who's addicted to demon's blood. The only way we've been able to counter it is by giving him small, regular doses of angel's blood, even if it is a bit diluted. Considering a quart of angel's blood can make a hundred blood pops, it's a sacrifice that can be made. He's tried the regular ones too, but they aren't nearly as effective around demons."

"The withdrawal is nastier than the taste," said Sam.

"Not to mention the looks on the angel's faces when they realize what you have," chortled Bree.

"What does demon's blood do anyway?"

"Increases adrenaline and testosterone, making it easier to access certain psychic abilities. The problem is that it's addicting as hell and is a very quick way to become a demon when you die. Sam here was on the wrong end of the karma spectrum because of that bitch Ruby, and it's only the blood pops that keep him from doing a slide back into his bad habits."

Harry shrugged.

"Meh, I've seen worse."

"Hermione's study guides from hell?" said Bree.

Harry winced at the thought.

"That reminds me...is she really married to Ron of all people?"

"Unfortunately. She could break it off is she wanted, but she's terrified that it would make me do the same with Ginny and leave the children with their mother."

Loki saw the odd look on Bree's face.

"Oh no...no no no! You aren't seriously considering..."

"Sam is an even match intelligence wise with Hermione, plus he wouldn't be intimidated by the fact she's a witch and extremely hex happy during that time of the month," said Bree.

Harry looked like he considered the idea, and it wasn't like there was anything holding Hermione from divorcing Ron for someone better for her. For some reason their magic was incompatible to the point where they couldn't produce any children.

Molly had been devastated when she heard that.

Dean sighed. He had finally returned to being a _guy_ again, though Castiel took full advantage of the situation and showed he wasn't afraid to top every once and a while.

"What's this Hermione like anyway?" he asked.

"A girl version of Sammy with frizzy hair and isn't as tall as Sam," said Bree flatly.

"So she's a nerd who loves looking up random crap just for the sake of knowing?"

"Nosy as hell, and she actually achieved a doctorate before she was twenty," said Harry.

"What does she look like anyway?" asked Sam.

Bree conjured a picture of his Hermione, and Harry nodded.

"That's her. How do you know what she looks like anyway?"

"I'm an alternate version of you who had the common sense to kill my Harry Potter identity the second my look changed enough to fool people. Anonymity is _fun_," said Bree, switching back to how he looked before.

Harry blinked, before he banged his head against the wall for not thinking of that himself.

Bree chuckled.

"Feel free to steal my identity after this mess is over. I can help set you up," he said.

"I might take you up on that... I can introduce you as a friend I made on vacation named Uncle Gabriel...should be enough to keep Molly off my back."

"One will and a changed account later and no one will think twice about Gabriel Winchester," chuckled Bree.

"Are you two done plotting?" asked Dean amused.

"Never. A Marauder is never done plotting his next prank," said Harry. Bree nodded in agreement. Loki snickered from where he was munching on chocolate frogs.


	9. Canon Alternate No Episode, America

_**Canon Universe, no episode**_

Exactly one month after Harry took his 'vacation' to America and discovered that being a hunter had all the appeal his job as an auror did only with no paperwork and far more action that the job actually had, his return to England was met with quite a bit of fan fare.

Mostly because Molly finally caught wind that he had all but abandoned his wife and children for a month without telling them where he was going.

After that fight Harry went to Hermione. Spending a month with Sam had given him all the things he needed to see that the 'Sasquatch' as his friends called him, would be good for her. Better than Ron anyway.

"Harry James Potter what are you up to?" demanded Hermione.

"I have a surprise for you...and I need to tell you something. Far away from prying ears," said Harry.

They found a secluded muggle restaurant where Harry cast enough privacy charms to give even him pause.

"What is going on?"

"I'm going to kill Harry Potter and set up another identity. I just can't keep this nonsense up Hermione! All the pressure because of the war and with the way things are with Ginny... it's getting to be too much."

"And what of the children?" asked Hermione.

"I already have a plan set up for that. I met someone in America who's going to help me set up a new identity in exchange for switching places with him when he leaves. His job is more interesting and fulfilling than my work as an auror, not to mention I did more helping people working with him than I ever did after war. And there's the fact that I don't feel anything for Ginny other than obligation."

"And why are you telling me?"

"Because I found someone who would be much better than Ron ever would and while he's a muggle hunter he doesn't seem to mind dating a witch. He's been to Stanford and nearly took the test to be a lawyer before his family's calling brought him back into the fold. There is a minor catch though."

"What?"

"He was hurt by a demon who turned him into a partial vampire with an addiction to demon's blood. They've found a way to keep the addiction from rearing it's ugly head, but he eats blood pops often," said Harry.

"Is that all?"

"He's also emotionally dependent on his older brother. The two of them have been through hell, but their relationship is workable at best. They're considered a package deal at best," said Harry.

"What is his name?" she asked. Judging by the tone she was seriously considering it.

"Sam Winchester."

"Oh bloody hell. Those books are real?" said Hermione.

"What books?"

"_Supernatural_. It's a series by Carver Edmund about two brothers named Sam and Dean who hunt monsters. It's fact not fiction?"

"I've met Sam and Dean. So what do you say?"

"Let's go met your hunter friends. If the books really are based on fact we'll get along fine."

"Wait till you see my double," grinned Harry.

"What..." started Hermione before Harry used Side-Along to take them straight to Bree's little pocket dimension.

"Double...Dammit, Harry a little warning!" she finished.

"Where's the fun in that?" asked Bree and Harry. Since seeing him look exactly like him, Harry and Bree had great delight doing the twin-speak that Fred and George had loved so much.

The headaches they gave everyone else trying to follow them were enormous. It had the benefit of making Harry grin like a mad man for hours.

Hermione groaned in horror.

"Dear god there's two of you now..."

"Mione, meet Gabriel Winchester."

"Name's Bree runt," said Bree cheerfully. Hermione looked around her.

"Is this an actual TARDIS?"

"Pocket dimension spell used on most trunks combined with a love of the _Doctor Who_ series. That and a small outlet where I can put a time-turner means I have an actual TARDIS, even if I can't go to other worlds just yet," grinned Bree.

"So is that what you really look like?" asked Hermione.

Bree snapped his fingers and went back to his normal look.

"What...how did you..."

"I'm part-angel, and before you ask no I am not a damn Nephilim. Why people keep calling me that when they find out I'm half angel is beyond me. The technical term is angelic cambion."

"So why are you here?"

"Have you ever heard of the Walking Man?"

"No."

"A human or being is picked by either Fate, God or some higher power that is bound by the no direct interference clause to serve as their messenger or avatar on Earth where they correct whatever imbalance is present. Basically I'm an alternate version of Harry who was chosen to be the Walker, an angel who works as Fate's chosen to correct the imbalance caused by multiple repeated events. In this case Lucifer, the fallen arch angel, being set free from hell and then breaking out because the seal was never complete to begin with."

"What seal?"

"The seal of the four horsemen. Because Harry is the Master of Death and possesses the Resurrection stone, the seal was incomplete and Micheal had been sealed in hell."

"You mean angels and demons exist?" asked Hermione.

Bree released his wings, and she gasped.

"I'm the ascended half-angel son of Gabriel, the Angel of Judgment. You tell me," said Bree.

"Ascended?"

"Basically it means I came into full possession of my father's arch angel heritage, while still retaining my mother's human half. Thankfully that meant I got a new look so I could 'kill' my Harry Potter persona. I can turn back into him at any time, but I never do because of all the crap I had to deal with during my school years."

"And what of my alternate?"

"I set you up with a friendly, if mischievous 900-year old Irish warlock named Patrick who gambles for years instead of cash. Last time I checked the two of you were rather happy together...if only because he's willing to feed your book addiction and you are used to pranksters."

"I've heard of Patrick. Isn't he the legendary gambler?" asked Hermione.

"Yup. And he told me the trick to giving and taking years since I beat him for a hundred years to use as favors. So what do you say Hermione? Care to meet the real Sam Winchester?"

"Is he anything like the books?"

"They nearly shot Chuck when they found out he had been publishing their life story!" cackled Bree.

* * *

Hermione Granger (not Weasly as she didn't feel the spark, according to her) sized up Sam Winchester.

"Those books didn't do either of you justice."

Dean and Sam winced. Not another crazy fan.

"Why do people even read those anyway?" asked Dean.

"Because of how dark this world is, it's always nice to read a bit of fantasy to escape it. Besides one of my former roommates recommended it and even gave me three of them for my birthday."

"Hermione Granger is a bigger bookworm than Sam or Bobby. If you have an obscure book, she'll read it long before you have a chance to offer it!" laughed Harry.

"And just so we're clear, I am not a fan of that ridiculous Wincest website run by that crude American girl Becky. I have to deal with that crap enough in Britain thank you," said Hermione.

"Thank god...a sensible fan of the books," muttered Dean.

Hermione and Sam had a rather nice date...nice enough that she was seriously considering the guy her brother-in-all-but-blood set her up with. She just wasn't getting anywhere with Ron, and she just clicked with Sam. She could live with his addiction to blood pops considering Castiel, Dean's boyfriend, was supplying the blood once every two months.

She was even approved of by Bobby, which according to Dean was a rarity.

"So this is what you do all day?" asked Harry.

"I became a research monkey by accident and fell in love with the work. Hunters love me because I help with a guarantee for a refund if the info doesn't work out, which is more than other research monkeys give."

"...This research is more fun than doing homework. Sure the cash isn't as steady, but it's infinitely better than my last job. You sure you don't mind me taking this over?"

"I am you after all. No way in hell am I leaving my alternate self stuck with the ginger fan girl who looks far too much like my mother."

Harry shuddered. Why he had never noticed the similarities he had no idea, but it made him sick to think of it now.

"I've already started showing up as 'Uncle Gabriel' so you should be good to go on that front. And I've left you the vault keys. You finish making that will?"

"Made it last week. When I kill off Harry Potter, everyone will grieve and never think to look for Bree Winchester...by the way how did Sam and Dean react to that name anyway?"

"They said they were fine with claiming you as a younger brother considering you'll be the one making Sam's blood pops for them using Castiel's blood," said Bree. "And since I will be the one to say that I didn't kill Harry Potter with veritaserum to back me up when that comes up, you'll be in the clear to have a relationship with the kids without having to deal with Ginny."

"George said he'll back me up, as will Charlie and Bill once I told them my plans. The only thing holding me back was the kids."

Only those that had proven that they trusted Harry, not the boy-who-lived, during the war and weren't blindsided by Dumbledore's bullshit were being told the truth. Ron and Molly were never told because they would take it the wrong way and ruin everything Harry was trying to do.

They would see it as a betrayal of his marriage to Ginny and ducking out of his responsibility as a parent. He loved his children, but he couldn't stand to be married to Ginny any more and he didn't want his kids to hate him for separating them from their mother.

All four of them were told about what their father would be doing and that he would be coming around as often as he could while his 'work' allowed him under a disguise.

As far as they were concerned he was under 'Witness Protection' because of the Hallows and didn't want them to be hurt. They were even introduced to Bree who they would pretend was their 'Uncle'.

"So how do we kill Harry Potter?" asked Harry.

"Same way my version of Vernon and Dudley were killed. Wendigo attack. I can act as the Wendigo and take you off to 'die' while Ginny acts as witness to the attack."

Harry snorted...his soon-to-be ex-wife was going to be his best witness to his 'death'. Talk about ironic. He had already transferred most of the Potter fortune to the 'Winchester' vault and with Bill's help cleared the evidence.

All Ginny would get was three thousand galleons...the rest was tied to the children's trust vaults which she couldn't touch even if she was their mother.

* * *

Harry set up the trap, including enough blood to fool any investigations done, and they would be done.

The fact that the 'Wendigo' would make an escape into the woods and vanish would be a moot point. Of course Bree would cover that with his 'presence' at the scene and actual burnt ashes of a Wendigo.

It took a month and several fake deaths (complete with birth certificates and other backgrounds which would disappear once the investigation was closed) before 'Harry Potter' was dead by a Wendigo eating him.

Ginny was originally horrified, then pissed when she learned how little of the Potter fortune she would receive, as Harry had simply added more gold to the children's trust funds rather than leave any to her outside the amount he had already set. One thousand for each year they spent together.

She seemed really pissed that he left most of his fortune and everything else to Gabriel Winchester, a noted employer of muggleborns.

(Bree had taken a full year to recreate his business and would hand it over to Harry once he left. Considering all he had to do was insure that the business never ended up going bankrupt and giving people their paychecks on time, Harry now had more time to himself.)

There was a brief investigation, but no one thought to check if the memories were faked about the deaths or the report of the Wendigo when the test came back positive that it was the ashes. This was because Hermione had heard of their elaborate plan from the start and had helped make the fake victims.

Bree was an expert hacker...making fake victims for a Wendigo was cakewalk since he helped hunters kill the damn things.

And now that Harry Potter was officially 'dead' in the eyes of the magical populace, he was free to live his life and see his children without ever having to deal with Ginny ever again.

* * *

_**Not much Supernatural in this chapter, but I felt it was needed. Bree will be fixing not only Sam and Dean's mess, but also that of his alternates. At least that way it will still be an HP/Supernatural cross.**_

_**Also I loathe the Harry/Ginny pairing in canon. Absolutely **_**hate****_ it. Ron and Hermione was the second worst pairing, as they have very little in common aside from sharing a few adventures with Harry. Hermione can do much, much better than Ron._**


	10. Canon Alternate End, First Alternate

_**Canon Universe,**_** Point of No Return****_, set after _Hammer of the Gods**

It was the news of the century, Harry's death and the subsequent 'adoption' of the Potter heirs. They were still invited over to see the Weaslys, but other than that they wanted nothing to do with their harpy mother.

Ginny apparently 'jumped ship' as it were and wasted no time heading to the next rich husband...Draco Malfoy.

Harry was properly disgusted with her behavior.

"Give me the word and I'll make it look like she planned your murder," said Bree seriously.

"How?"

"There's a reason why I chose Wendigo attack. Makes it easy to get people to believe that it was planted. All I have to do is have Hermione 'find' evidence that the Wendigo ashes were planted and steal Ginny's wand and I can forge evidence that she killed you and used a Wendigo to cover it up. One of the benefits of being a time traveler is that I can go back and steal her wand."

"Can I have some time to think on it?"

A week later Harry had Bree go into the past to steal Ginny's wand and make it look like she killed him and destroyed most of the evidence. Bree had, in a fit of boredom fourth year, learned to 'hack' a wand into thinking it's real owner had cast a spell when he borrowed Ron's wand.

So duplicating Ginny's magical signature was cakewalk.

It took all of three days before Ginny was the number one suspect for Harry's "murder" even though she had no idea it was a set-up. She kept wondering when her children would show up to at least support her, but they were much happier with "Uncle Gabe"and didn't help her case at all when they mentioned the rows she had with Harry because he wasn't showing any interest in her.

The fact Harry had divorce paperwork ready to be filed left with the goblins shortly after finishing his 'will' didn't help her either.

Everyone knew that Harry and Ginny were having problems in their marriage. The only reason Harry even stayed was for the children and it was obvious to everyone who the children preferred when it came to their parents.

Ginny was now a persona-non-grata in the magical communities. She eventually left Britain for one of the other magical areas and changed her name.

Harry still acted as Gabriel Winchester, or Gabe, though. Bree was uncannily good at recreating his company and had no issues handing it over to his alternate. It wasn't like he actually _used_ the gold aside to pay for food.

Dean had looked about ready to kiss him when Bree enchanted his car to never need gas ever again. Castiel was extremely jealous.

Gabe had set up a house near Bobby's area so that they would have a safe place to apparate or port key into. Bree had set the wards so that people could go into the panic room...but they would have to break the circle in order to get out. The same went for angel and demon transportation.

The last thing he did was give Gabe all of his memories so that he could fight like a hunter and not get killed. He even set up with a double of his laptop so he could act as Monkey Magic without drawing suspicion.

Considering his time was drawing to a close because Adam would be revived soon, Bree knew he would be thrown into the next alternate once Micheal came on the scene. He could always come back with his new portable house, but his assistance was quickly becoming moot.

On the plus side, Hermione had dumped Ron and started dating Sam for real. She could live with his blood addiction if it meant having someone intelligent to talk to, and Sam loved the fact that Hermione could match him in the research department and wasn't angry at him for starting the apocalypse.

If she could live with the nonsense Harry used to get into, she could live with the crap Sam and Dean had following them around.

* * *

Castiel and Gabriel (he only went as Loki in public) cried out in shock as Adam Winchester was forcibly revived.

As Bree had pointed out, they were only following god's original orders, which was to love all his creations. Technically they hadn't done anything to lose their Grace because they still believed in Him and were willing to fight in order to give humanity it's best chance.

Even if it meant killing their fellow angels.

Castiel brought Adam to them, but Bree told him not to add the sigils that would allow him to remain hidden.

"Why?" asked Gabriel.

"Micheal can't add them once he takes Adam, since Dean clearly doesn't want to be his vessel. And he's too strong for another angel to add them for him, so Adam can't remain hidden. He would have to use normal methods and it will help us avoid him and Lucy later," said Bree.

"Agreed," said Gabe.

"I want to know why the hell they brought him back to begin with! And I thought Micheal needed consent to take a human vessel?" said Hermione.

"Adam agreed to be brought back. That can be construed as consent for Micheal's purposes. If Dean can't be convinced, then they'll take Adam as his replacement, willing or not. It happened last time and I ended up here," said Bree.

"Who the hell are you people? Where is Zachariah?"

"Soon to be dead if I have anything to say about it. Zachariah is a sanctimonious prick who deserves a kick to the balls upon sight, and a stab to the heart when he really gets going. His only job is to use you to get to Dean because he's at least strong enough to tell Micheal and the other angels to go screw themselves when they start demanding things. You however, are a weak little civilian. Micheal is going to take your body and use it as his meat suit."

"Why would anyone not agree to angels? They're the good guys!"

"Most of them are as bad as Zachariah personality wise. Castiel and Loki here are the extremely rare exception to the rule. As Dean once said, angels are dicks with wings," said Bree flatly.

"Oh for god's sake. Micheal and the other angels are just using you because Dean had more common sense than you do apparently. Now either you grow up or I'll hex you," said Hermione.

"Since when do you idiots travel with a witch?" demanded Adam.

Hermione bristled at his tone.

"OW!"

"The brightest witch of her age. Don't piss off the bookworm dumbass," said Gabe.

"That reminds me...Guys, I've moved all your stuff into Gabe's house and added the wards so you'll have a fall back position. I've even added a panic room that is exactly like Bobby's and another for the kids. If as I suspect, I end up being sent to the next alternate, at least you'll have something to work with. All your phones have been set so that they can call me across the time-space problem. If my dad can call me from my time line, I see no reason why you can't do the same."

"Why don't you know what happens next?" asked Gabriel in the kitchen.

"According to your alternate from my time, the future where the Croatoan virus was always set loose because the seal was never complete. Then the world was reset back to start and the cycle repeated. So if something happens when Lucifer is finally sealed properly, you'll need a way to contact me. Remember, after Lucifer is sealed, I'm as in the dark as you guys."

Gabriel took Bree's cell phone and added a special feature.

"What did you do?"

"If what you said was true, then I was able to contact you from your time. I see no reason you shouldn't be able to contact him from now. Plus once you figure out how you can do the same to that box of yours and really make it into a duplicate of the T.A.R.D.I.S.," said Gabriel.

"Point. You do realize I'll be trying to figure out what you did during the next alternate in my spare time?"

"At least you'll have something to do!" laughed Gabriel.

* * *

Adam was once again taken, and like Bree warned, held by angels. He showed Gabe how to cast the angel banishing charm (something he created after he examined the banishing sigil) and he took great pleasure in tossing out the ones in the warehouse.

Bree mostly used it to get Castiel out of the room while he cast some cleaning charms and to give Dean incentive to take a shower. Gabriel thought this fact was hilarious.

Hermione put her knowledge of hexes to destroy the door (most of them created for use on her ex-fiance Ronald Weasly) while Sam and Bree ran in to get Adam.

The second the door closed and Zachariah appeared, Bree didn't hesitate to his by-now instinctive reaction.

He hit Zachariah with a Grace-infused kick to the balls in his shiny new steel-toed boots. The Seraph went down like a sack of bricks in absolute pain as Bree's grace overpowered his. He knew Sam would be sharing that particular memory with Dean once Hermione extracted it for him. The look on the pompous Seraph's face was _glorious_.

Bree pushed Sam and Adam outside the door before it slammed shut again and immediately concentrated on sliding into another time to avoid Micheal seeing him.

He didn't know if Micheal or Lucifer had also gotten the odd quirk to remember past alternates, but he wasn't taking the chance.

He felt his Grace taking effect and he dropped hard onto concrete outside Sioux Falls.

It took him five minutes to find the date, and a quick check told him exactly what he thought would happen after he came face to face with Micheal.

In order to avoid his death, he was given the power to 'slide' through alternates where Micheal couldn't follow.

Since he was clearly in a time before Sam returned to the hunting game, he was going to have some fun.

"Let the games begin!" grinned Bree.


	11. First Alternate, Pilot

_**First Alternate, three years before Dean brings Sam back to the Hunting Game**_

Gabe Evans was Sam's best friend. They had similar histories, similar interests, and both of them had absentee fathers who believed in the occult.

To Sam's amusement, that belief passed on to Gabe, who papered their shared room with what Sam knew to be actual warding symbols which Gabe claimed to get off the internet.

Apparently he believed in bad luck, and he didn't want to get bit by something.

Sam would occasionally yell out "Constant Vigilance!" to make them both laugh.

For a year, the two of them were as close as brothers. While Gabe believed in the occult, he never tried to push Sam about it. In fact he tended to ignore Halloween instead of trying anything like most 'Wiccans' he associated with. It took Sam all of two years to get that story out of him for why he hated Halloween more than Sam did.

And afterwords the two just went off to get drunk as hell in their apartment.

Every month or so Gabe would go off on a hunting trip to get the urge out and to test his weapons. He always brought something back, usually meat or a trophy. Sam now had an unusual belt buckle from one of Gabe's hunts made of the horn of some animal Gabe had freed from a poacher. He only ever hunted for meat, never for sport. Gabe had put some sort of symbol on the outside of the buckle, not that Sam cared as he didn't recognize it as a demon one.

He tended to wear it since it fit with most of his clothes and no one looked twice at it.

Sam had tried dating once or twice, and had lasted longest with a girl named Jessica, but for some reason she hated the occult and anything to do with it. Sam ended that relationship after he caught her cheating on him with another guy.

Gabe allowed him to mope about the incident for exactly three days before he brought home a puppy. The students could have pets so long as they were trained and they ponied up a hundred extra on rent.

Considering Sam usually ended up doing the dishes, grocery shopping (something about unpleasant encounters every time Gabe went shopping), and the laundry, Gabe tended to pay most of the rent.

Sam immediately named the dog Hunter as a joke, and the name stuck considering the dog was a boy.

A relative peace was maintained between the friends up until Sam's brother Dean reappeared in his life.

* * *

"Dad's gone on a _hunting_ trip...and he hasn't been seen for a few days," said Dean.

"What kind of hunting trip? Stalking prey can be a bitch and a half," asked Gabe.

"Look..."

"Gabe Evans, Sammy's roommate. Sam, if you're going to go stalk your dad, can you take Hunter with you? You know he likes you best," said Gabe.

"Who's Hunter?" asked Dean.

Sam almost laughed when he saw the evil glint in Gabe's eyes.

"Hunter, prank!"

With a loud bark, Dean was knocked on his ass by a hundred pound half-grown dog who was licking the crap out of his face. Sam didn't bother to hold back his laughter.

"What the hell is that?!" demanded Dean.

"Hunter."

Dean noticed something shiny on Hunter's nails.

"Is that silver paint?"

"Are you nuts? Why the hell would I put silver paint on a dog's claws? Those are pure silver caps that fit over the claws."

Sam blinked.

"I thought that was a joke?" he asked.

"Hell no! Why would I bother with paint when I can easily get actual caps that the dog can wear? Have you ever felt dog claws on you? They hurt like a bitch! Besides, werewolves will think twice before messing with me now!"

"Werewolves..." said Dean in disbelief, then he took note of the odd papers around the apartment.

"What the hell are those?"

"Warding sigils. I believe that there are things out there that defy human knowledge. You think I'm going to let a demon waltz in here without at least a warning?" said Gabe flatly.

Sam rolled his eyes.

"Gabe believes in the occult. And he takes pride in his wall art."

"So you taking Hunter or not?"

"You're cleaning up after him this time!" said Sam.

"Yeah, yeah Sasquatch. Get going already," said Gabe rolling his eyes.

* * *

"So what's the deal with your roommate? He a hunter?"

"Not from what I know. He apparently picked this up from his dad and kept up the belief out of respect for his parents. Some of the ward symbols are real though. And there is way too much salt around the house."

"Sammy?"

"Yeah Dean?"

"We are not taking the dog."

"We have to. Gabe said he would be working on something and Hunter prefers to hang around me. Anyway Gabe takes him out hunting often enough that he knows when to stay quiet. If he makes a mess Gabe will pay for it."

"He better," muttered Dean.

Hunter immediately jumped in the back seat and laid down on the blanket Sam had spread there. Dean kept half an eye on the mutt while they drove to where their dad had last been seen.

* * *

Gabe started packing up all his essentials, tossing them into his trunk where his actual house was. He wondered when Hunter would reveal his hellhound heritage...should be amusing.

Once he was done with all of his things, he waited for the yellow-eyed demon Azazel to show up. The second those warding sigil started to burn up, he was getting the hell out of there.

It took a few days, but once Sam called to say he was coming back, Gabe felt the wards kick in. They would warn off the demon long enough to get out of the apartment and leave Sam's things outside, since it would burn down. He vanished from the apartment just in time for Azazel to come in, cozy as you please.

* * *

"Gabe?" said Sam.

Hunter was growling, and he kind of freaked Sam out with the sound. This was his playful growl, no, this was closer to the sound he made when that ghost attacked Sam.

The growling grew worse the higher up they went.

Sam was seriously worried now. Hunter's growl was scaring him. Then he saw a bag with his name on it along with a note.

_'Sam, if you're reading this the ward sigils have likely set fire to the apartment. I made sure to get anything you would actually miss and leave it in the bag. If Hunter is really freaking you out, then avoid the apartment altogether as that means a demon tried to attack me. If I got out in time, then I'll call you in the morning. If not, well, Hunter is good at killing anything that goes bump in the night._

_Gabe."_

Sam blinked, then cautiously looked in the apartment with his gun drawn.

It was scorched to hell and back, and he could see where the old papers were as they had burnt into the walls. He could smell the stink of sulfur and see the circle where Gabe had presumably been. The window was wide open, more than enough for Gabe to escape through. He could see the signs of handprints and the smell of sulfur was strongest there.

"Sam!" cried Dean.

"A demon. It attacked Gabe!"

"How do you know?"

"He left a note when the symbols he had all over the apartment started to go off. And there's sulfur everywhere."

"I'm sending these to Bobby. We need to get going now!"

Sam noticed one last note on the table.

_'Almost forgot...all the damages were paid for in advance...told them it was a party. Make sure your brother doesn't shoot Hunter when he really starts to show his worth.'_

Sam blinked. Clearly Gabe had known something bad was coming, otherwise he wouldn't have had time to pack up Sam's things and insure Hunter wouldn't be around when it came.

Thought Dean would deny it, the dog had come in handy and actually scared the ghost from attacking Sam. It had been asleep in the Impala when the thing had shown up, and when the car stopped Hunter had managed to take a bite out of the thing.

Sam had been quite surprised, as a normal dog couldn't effect a ghost.

* * *

Gabe watched the monitors, answering his requests from other hunters for information.

He had developed a very powerful virus that would sent his contact information to every hunter who accessed the internet to research their hunts. A simple pop up add that only a hunter would be able to decipher as a request hotline for information.

From there word would spread about a research monkey who gave accurate info, and his empire would build up again. No more would he be forced to visit every hunter hotspot just to get clients.

The digital age was a wonderful thing. Being a magical hacker able to break through firewalls and wards with a thought just made his enjoyment all the better.


	12. First Alternate, A few months later

_**First Alternate, a few months after the attack on Gabe...**_

Sam was worried about his friend who was far too interested in the occult for his own safety.

At least he never had to worry about Hunter being shot by Dean.

Not only did Hunter always stay on the blanket while in the Impala, but he had the oddest effect on creatures that could rip a normal dog to shreds.

The last time they ran into a ghost, the guy had screamed bloody murder when Hunter bit into his ass. Plus the dog was like an early warning system. Anything evil in nature approached, he started snarling like some sort of monster from hell.

He had saved Dean five times already, yet he never tried to bite him. As far as he was concerned, Hunter was part of the family.

Finally, after three months Gabe called about a hunting trip in an area they knew to have an active Wendigo.

Sam was so worried about Gabe that he agreed to it, believing that Gabe was just an idiot for not thinking ahead.

He would later be kicking himself for not figuring it out sooner.

* * *

"Everyone, inside the circle now!" barked Gabe.

Dean and Sam followed his directions since he had been in the area three days and not attacked by the Wendigo.

The thing howled like the damned, but the look on Gabe's face was cold as he chanted in perfect Latin under his breath. Suddenly it shrieked from pain, and ran off.

"What the hell? I thought you were just a regular hunter?" said Dean.

"What the hell gave you that impression idjit? The warding sigils around the apartment alone should have tipped you off! Not to mention the fact I got the hell out of there when I knew a demon had come to the house!"

"You're like us?" said Sam incredulous.

"I'm a hunter, like you two idjits! And Hunter is a half-hellhound crossbreed I came across."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. That dog is a hellhound cross?" said Dean.

"Normal dogs would be eaten alive against the things I hunt. So long as I remain alpha dog in his mind, he's harmless. He respects Sam as a beta."

"And me?" Dean had to ask.

"You're either an Omega or possibly alpha. It would take a lot to kill a full-blooded hellhound, but that only means he'll heal faster than normal. Oh, and when he starts to get randy, bring him to me in order to get fixed. He'll rip you and any vet to shreds if you tried it," said Gabe.

Dean gave Hunter a look.

"So long as he doesn't mark me or our stuff, I could care less."

"Why didn't you tell me you were a hunter?" asked Sam hurt.

"And drive you out of the apartment? I'm a research monkey who goes on a hunt once a month, if that. Hell, that belt buckle I gave you is one for protection made out of fallen unicorn horn!"

"Unicorns don't exist," said Dean.

"They do, but someone like you wouldn't come anywhere near one. Let's kill this damn thing and then we can talk. And before you ask Sam, I'll explain everything you need to know."

They went in, freed the victims and then found a nice cafe two towns away for pie. Gabe offered to buy the first round of coffee and all the pie Dean could eat.

* * *

"So who are you really?"

"Name's Gabriel Evans, but you can call me Bree if you like. I'm a research monkey who takes on the local hunts around wherever my residence is at the moment, but I mostly make money selling info and locations for possible hunts. The only reason I didn't tell you the full truth Sam was because I realized you weren't interested in doing anymore hunting for a while. So I pretended I was an occult nerd," said Bree.

"Thanks for that," said Sam. It was nice to share his knowledge with someone who believed him, but didn't force him to do anything with it.

"Where did you find the dog though?" asked Dean.

"In a local kennel. Realized what he was and decided to take him him since he would be a good hunting partner. You have any idea how hard it is to actually _hurt_ a hellhound, even a half-breed one, badly enough that it will stay down without mauling you?" asked Bree.

"No, I don't."

"They're tough enough that some demons use them as precursors to warn people that their contract is up. Believe me, they are not pleasant. And eventually Hunter will learn to go all Predator on anything stupid enough to hunt _you_," said Bree.

"Wait, he can go invisible?"

"Hellhounds by nature are invisible to all but certain orders of beings. Angels and demons, for one. And before you claim there's no such thing as angels, all I can say is be glad they haven't taken an interest in you. They are dicks with wings, with the exception of a rare few," said Bree with a growl.

"Met one have you?"

"Zachariah. Bastard pisses me off without even trying. I kick him in the balls on instinct because I can't stand the sanctimonious asshole," said Bree.

"Isn't Zachariah the name of a seraph?" asked Sam.

"I don't give a shit if he's the angel of farting pixie dust out his ass. The man is a complete and unrepentant asshole who deserves to have his balls broken. Besides, he isn't above screwing a human over to get them to agree to something. Uriel is worse though. He'll kill an innocent child just because his older brothers told him to. He nearly leveled a small town just because two idiot witches were trying to bring a high-level demon into it."

"So why did you become a hunter?" asked Sam.

"I was seven and on a camping trip with my mother's sister when my uncle and cousin were attacked by a Wendigo. A hunter found me three days later in a tree and killed it, rescuing my aunt. My fat ass cousin and uncle died of heart attacks hours after they were captured."

"I'm sorry," said Sam.

"I'm not. Vernon and Dudley were complete assholes, not to mention abusive. Them getting killed was the best thing to happen to me, and I am not exaggerating. After that I started training to become a hunter once I was legally old enough to live on my own. Hunters love me because I always double check my info before I send it to them."

"Oh yeah? How do you kill a vampire?" asked Dean.

"Cut off it's head. Stakes don't do shit."

"Shapeshifter?"

"Use silver."

"Ghosts?"

"Salt and iron to distract, then salt and burn the remains."

"Detecting a demon?"

"Holy water, salt, or demon's trap. Which reminds me, take these. Portable demon's traps, activates on contact with anyone possessed. Another big indicator is their eyes turn black, though some have dominate colors like Azazel, who's eyes are yellow."

Dean was about to ask another before that last statement hit him.

"Wait, did you say a yellow-eyed demon?"

"Yeah, that's Azazel. He's been up to something for years now, giving kids psychic powers that activate when they turn twenty-two. Demon's blood is a well-known catalyst for psychic abilities, mostly because it boosts adrenaline and testosterone."

"How many?"

"Over fifteen kids so far. Some of them lose their parents in a fire, but most don't. Rumor among the demons is that he's trying to raise an army for something," said Bree.

"How do you know all this?"

"I give crossroad demons a choice between getting gutted and living. They can either act as informants or I kill them. Most tend to cooperate once they see my favorite weapon."

Bree brought out a modified dagger with familiar sigils all over it. Sam recognized them from their old apartment.

"I can get you two demon killing blades, but it will take a month. The real issue would be finding you once they're ready," said Bree.

"We can give you our number," said Dean.

"Or you could just check your contact information..." said Bree dryly.

Sam blinked then remembered an odd name that popped up in his phone after he entered it in an online ad that was clearly aimed at hunters.

"Wait a minute...are you Monkey Magic?"

"Guilty."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"It's my hunter nickname. I sell info to hunters remember? My slogan is that I give you accurate information or your money back to your nearest descendant. Starting rate is a hundred fifty, the more dangerous the information the higher the cost. I send hunt info to anyone interested for fifty bucks, complete with background research and most likely culprit."

"Dude, that sounds way too good to be true."

Bree brought out a laptop and pulled up his site.

"Go ahead and type in the city and state. It will give you the nearest thing to hunt within a day's distance, or you can set it."

Dean inputted the city they were in and state. Five seconds later five different hunts popped up.

"A witch, werewolf, hints of a vampire coven within the last month, and two pissed off ghosts."

"What about the pulsing red dots?"

"Suspicious activity. Usually some idiot brings a crossroad demon out and it sticks around. I have my computer searching sudden successes or overnight winnings and if anything stands out it gets flagged. I do a follow-up and tell the hunters in the area if it's a demon or not. If it's confirmed, I sell the portable demon's trap to any hunters interested so they can safely take them out."

Dean definitely looked interested in the site now. Bree gave them the address (including another one he made as a joke, according to him called Hunter Kill Count which backed up each kill with actual evidence, whether it was a receipt or jail record) and they parted ways.

A month later Bree called Sam and brought two brand new demon-killing knives. He even brought back Hunter, since he had missed the dog...and to reassert his status as the hellhound half-breed's alpha. Dean actually looked happy to have the dog back, despite his dislike of dog hair in his beloved Impala.

"Definitely the omega," snorted Bree.


	13. First Alternate, In My Time of Dying

_**First Alternate, nearly nine months after the Wendigo**_

Bree looked at his phone with an odd look. Who the hell was calling him?

"Hello? They've _what_? I'm on my way straight there!" said Bree.

How they were hit by a semi-trailer he had no idea. All he knew was that someone had seen his number as an emergency contact in Dean's wallet and acted accordingly.

"Gabe!" said Sam.

"What the hell happened?"

"Azazel possessed some truck driver who slammed into us. Dad and I are okay, but Dean's in critical condition," said Sam.

Ever since he revealed himself to be a fellow hunter, Sam and Gabe had become best friends all over again. Gabe sent them on hunts (without making them pay the usual amount) and they kept him in the loop.

"Who the hell is this?"

"Gabe Evans. Fellow hunter and apparently one of Dean's emergency contacts," said Bree dryly. He handed John Winchester the standard demon trap and it didn't react.

"What the hell is this supposed to be?"

"It's a portable demon's trap. Activates upon skin contact if someone's possessed and traps the demon so you can exorcise it. Saved my life twice," said Sam.

"Better than holy water, because the demons generally don't react to picking up a piece of paper," said Bree.

"Which reminds me...have you heard of a demon named Meg?"

"No, but I have heard from the crossroad demon grapevine that Azazel is working with his bitchy daughter and asshole son. The girl has a pack of hellhounds at her disposal, so watch your ass."

"A bit late on that one," said Sam sourly.

"How the hell did they catch your dad anyway?"

"They forced us to waste a bullet on them."

"Oh for the love of _god_ please tell me you don't have that stupid Colt on you! That thing isn't even all that good except as one of the more well known demon-killing weapons!" said Bree throwing his hands up.

John growled at him.

"This coming from someone who can make a knife that even Azazel is wary of," said Sam.

"At least the knife works on most things, and I don't _claim_ that it's a one-hit kill weapon. The Colt isn't the thing that kills the damn demons, it's the specially-treated bullets anyway."

"What?" demanded John.

"All that's special about the Colt is that it's spelled to shoot straight and can open a hell gate. It's the bullets that have been specially treated with several arch angel sigils and blessed with both holy oil and water that make it so effective at killing things. If you don't believe me, take out a bullet and look at it closely."

John took out a bullet from the Colt and examined it. It looked like a mass-manufactured bullet except for the engravings all over it and the fact that it had an odd sheen.

"Now Sasquatch, take me to Dean so I can berate him properly for his crappy driving," said Bree clapping his hands.

"He's in a coma," said Sam.

"Not for long he ain't. Where's Hunter anyway?"

"Dad tried to shoot him, so he's probably sticking with the Impala," said Sam glaring at his father before they left the room. Dean and Sam loved Hunter, who held his own in hunts. He even learned how to do that Predator trick Bree mentioned when he took out a shapeshifter trying to disguise itself as Dean to frame him.

The shapeshifter had to change his form in order to get away from Hunter.

* * *

Bree whistled at the damage.

"Brain damage right? Where's his soul?" asked Bree.

"What?"

"Stay here while I hunt down an idjit."

It took Bree five minutes to find and drag Dean back to the room without looking like a complete idiot.

"You, stay here while I work some mojo to get you back in."

"_**Dude, there's a reaper here!"**_ said Dean.

"Of course there's a reaper here you moron. This _is_ a hospital! Reapers tend to get stationed here," said Bree.

"You can hear Dean?" asked Sam.

"Eh, a small perk of something that happened when I was seventeen and naïve. I can see Reapers and hellhounds. Speaking of reapers...Get in here or sulk outside!" said Bree.

The reaper, a woman named Tessa, came in looking very irritated at him. She said something only Bree and Dean could hear and he stuck his tongue out at her. Then said something that, once again, Sam couldn't hear at all.

"_**Dean here won't die. He's to be Micheal's vessel when Lucifer breaks free. Either I put him back or you get taken over by a rather irritating demon called Azazel,"**_ said Bree.

"_**Master of Death or not, you don't have the authority to heal a human!"**_ said Tessa.

Bree smirked at her.

"_**I'm an angel cambion. I have the power to heal Dean without invoking a demon contract."**_

Tessa gave him a look that said 'Prove it.'

Bree grabbed Dean's soul and placed his other hand on the area where his heart would be. Using a bit of his Grace, he healed Dean and made sure that his soul would go in smoothly. Dean took a gasp of air and nearly choked on the ventilation tube in his mouth had Sam not taken it out.

"What the hell?"

"Heaven is more like it. You should be glad I like you enough to risk putting myself on Heaven's radar this early," said Bree.

"Gabe? What happened?" demanded Dean.

"You were attacked by the same demon your father was hunting. If you hadn't had me on your emergency contacts, I wouldn't have known you needed healing. And before you ask Sam, I'm not healing your dad. I'm not idiot enough to put myself at risk for something he'll survive anyway."

He noted Tessa the Reaper had vanished, most likely to tell Death about this development. Dean wouldn't remember anything from his out-of-body experience, which was a good thing.

Dean was cleared by the doctors to get up and move around, but they wanted to observe him for a while before they allowed him to sign out.

"Sammy, how's my baby?" asked Dean.

Sam couldn't look at Dean in the eyes.

"Sammy?"

"Dean, I don't know how to tell you this but..."

* * *

"Sam, what happened to your brother?" demanded John. Last time he checked, Dean was in a coma and it didn't look good.

Sam looked at Bree pointedly.

"For the last time Sam, I'm not healing your dad. He'll have to suffer through his own idiocy for a bit. The amount of power I used to heal Dean attracted enough attention as it is!"

"What the hell are you?" growled John.

"Not a demon, and most demons hate my kind anyway. All you need to know is that I'm more powerful and hate demons. The only reason I can even keep in the loop is by threatening to kill the bastards if they don't talk," said Bree rolling his eyes.

Seeing the look on John's face, Bree pulled out something from his pocket.

"Dean, take a drink."

"Don't you dare Dean!" said his father.

Dean sniffed the flask, before his eyes widened.

"Why do you carry Holy water in your pocket? It tastes worse when it's warm!"

"To prove to idjits like your dad that I'm not evil. I have a pure silver earring in my left ear for god's sake."

Dean took a drink and then Bree followed suit. Nothing happened.

John kept giving him suspicious looks which Bree ignored with practice ease. He was used to crap like this from Hogwarts for god's sake. John Winchester had nothing on those degenerate gossip mongers.

By the time John Winchester was able to leave the hospital, Sam and Dean had already left to fix the car. It would be a month before he could go out on a hunt again.

If he couldn't tell Gabe was one of the good guys, then clearly he needed to reign in his paranoia. Bobby liked Gabe, and that was all they needed to know.

* * *

Dean leaned down for what they considered their dog.

"Hunter, here boy!"

Hunter barked and ran right to his secondary 'master'. As far as he was concerned Sam was his master after Bree.

Dean took the 'kisses' from the half-hellhound with ease. It had saved his ass when the full blood ones had attacked them and pinned his father down when the demon had taken over him...they wouldn't have known he was possessed had Hunter not started going nuts around John.

Boy had their old man been pissed when Dean stabbed him in the arm. The demon had been even more angry over that.

Dean actually cried when he saw the state of his beloved car. Hunter tried to cheer him up, since it was his favorite place to sleep.

"Maybe Gabe will know someone who can fix it," said Sam.

"I wonder why dad hates Gabe so much," asked Dean. He liked the kid, who did everything in his power to keep them alive, even healing them! As far as he was concerned, the goofy research monkey was practically family already.

"You know dad, he's suspicious of anyone we got close to or felt comfortable around without over a year of knowing them. Remember how he used to act around Bobby?"

Dean grimaced. He had almost forgotten about that.

Gabe showed up a few days later looking like hell.

"What happened to you?" asked Bobby. They were trying and failing to repair the Impala.

"Some moron sent a demon after me. Probably trying to get information, from the way that demon kept asking around the town I was in for the week," said Bree annoyed.

"You don't think..." said Bobby. John had come to him for some odd ingredients, ones which were noted for summoning demons.

"The chances of John Winchester summoning a demon to find out about Gabe when he doesn't stay in one place more than a few weeks? Yeah, I can see him doing it," said Sam.

"He's probably lost the Colt to the demon for the information already," said Bree irritated.

"Your knives work better than the Colt has. It gets the demons without forcing us to reload the damn thing," said Dean. It was his favorite weapon.

Suddenly they all smelled sulfur and Hunter went on the defensive.

"Son of a bitch! These imbeciles never give up!" complained Bree.

There were at least ten demons there, all minor ones. He wasn't about to waste his time trying to kill them, so he started speaking in a language none of them understood. They did, however, notice the way the demons started screaming in fear.

"What in the samhill was that?!" demanded Bobby.

"Enochian. The language of the angels. Demons can't stand to hear it spoken by someone who's pure of soul," said Bree, giving them a half-truth.

Anyone with angel blood could do the same, it was just more likely to run in with someone with demon's blood.

When he found a survivor, Bree trapped it and loomed over it with a disturbing smile.

"Now who summoned a bunch of idiots like you to haunt me?" he asked.

"Some hunter named Winchester! Said he would trade the Colt for information on someone named Gabriel Evans!" said the demon terrified. It could sense what the humans couldn't...that Bree was a high class angel. More than enough for someone of his rank.

"Figures. Where is John Winchester?"

"Cleveland, Ohio!" said the demon quickly. Bree was notorious for allowing the smaller demons go if he got something to use on the bigger fish. He even gave Bree the room number.

"Right, I'm going to deal with this once and for all...and that damn Colt is going to be locked up! I am sick and tired of hearing people go nuts over that bloody thing!" said Bree, his original British accent slipping past the American one he had gained around the Winchester brothers.

He looked at Bobby who said "Get going ya idjit! I don't want anymore demons on my damn doorsteps!"

Bree left and came back two days later with a badly beaten up John Winchester. The brothers didn't ask why their father had developed a sudden fear of him, only that Bree had chewed into him but good for using demons to get intel.


	14. First Alternate, Simon Says and Croatoan

_**First Alternate, episodes Simon Says and Croatoan**_

The first minute Sam realizes that he's dealing with someone who shares his psychic gift, he calls Gabe for help.

"Good grief. This idiot has a twin in the wings...I can sense it."

"Your odd power over souls?" asked Sam. He had only witnessed it once in the hospital and felt it wise not to mention it to Dean.

Especially not after what happened to their father when the demons came to collect him, rather pissed off that he had given the Colt to someone who had no use for the thing.

Even Dean couldn't defend his father for doing something that was absolutely idiotic, like summon demons to get information on someone who had only ever helped them without once demanding payment outside of cash.

As any hunter would tell you, demons have no use for cash. They were more interested in souls.

"Gabe! Glad you could make it!" said Dean.

"Yeah. He's like Sam, only in this case he has a twin brother. I don't think he's behind the murders in town," said Gabe.

"I have a twin?"

"Yup. I looked up your records before I came here once Sam gave me the name. You were split up at birth, but unlike Sam your mother wasn't killed by the demon who goes by the name Azazel. Only a few have ever had that happen," said Gabe.

"So what do we do?"

"Well I do have something that will make it infinitely harder to use his powers...which reminds me, Sammy we'll have to start on your training so I can clean out any demonic influence left in you by the demon. But the easiest method would be to talk to him and see why he's killing people. We may have to take him out."

"I'm not killing my own twin!"

"Who said you were going to do the killing? If he's an unrepentant murderer, I'll be the one to deal with him in a permanent fashion. Whether he lives or not is debatable."

In reality Bree was tempted to show the little murdering bastard what an angel looks like uncensored. Burn out his eyes, or possibly drive him insane by speaking in Enochian with his Grace. He knew that angels could speak without driving a human insane, but the use of Grace when doing so had become an ingrained habit by the time they took a vessel. It was something Bree learned from his dad when he first obtained his own.

Either way this human wasn't going to survive an encounter with Bree. He was just that irritated for Sam bothering him on his vacation to a nude beach in Tahiti.

* * *

Bree ignored the psychic compulsion the idiot was using...really it had nothing on an Imperious with any serious intent. It seemed the twin brother wasn't too bright as he focused his entire gift on Bree who shrugged it off with practiced ease.

"You're a hundred years and a blood war too late to get one of those past me brat. I was able to shrug off the magical version of your compulsions when I was fourteen," sneered Bree.

Sam filed that information to himself. He had long suspected Gabe wasn't normal, but as long as he wasn't trying to kill him, Dean or Bobby he could care less.

Gabe closed the distance and threw the idiot halfway across the concrete with a vicious uppercut. He could just tell Dean was chuckling at that one.

Breaking both his arms and handcuffing him to the railing kept him nice and cozy...a few charms to turn his power back on him would insure he got his just rewards.

Apparently the one Bree labeled 'good twin' didn't have any issues with his brother being in jail. And the girl the evil one planned to kill for dumping his brother had no reservations about claiming he had been the one to kill those people.

A little planted evidence went a long way, more so when the police weren't checking for magical sources.

* * *

The second time Sam interrupts Bree's nice little vacation (he has his information service down to an art form, and word of his site directing hunters to hunts in the local area have netted him a nice little nest egg) they were in Oregon on an odd case.

Considering Bree remembered his history very well after doing their Hunter bio, he agrees to meet them just outside of town at a nearby diner.

During the first repeat, Bree had gone to every single private and public air port so he could memorize the apparition points. A few charms would dissuade anyone from messing with his little box, not that the sign didn't keep any interested parties from bothering him.

As far as the American Ministry was concerned, he was a wandering British wizard who took up hunting in his spare time. So long as he didn't break any of their laws, they agreed to ignore him.

A few discreet bribes for diplomatic immunity didn't hurt either.

Bree discreetly checked the Winchester Brother bio and a list of hunts before he narrowed down what they were dealing with. He was almost rather smug at the fact that he would be immune to the virus, as would Sam and Dean considering the angels would never allow them to be taken over by something as simple as the Croatoan virus...not this early anyway.

Besides, he'd long since learned that specially treated holy water could erase the virus...so long as it was boosted by angel's blood anyway.

* * *

"Gabe!" said Dean grinning. Beside him was a very well trained hellhound half-breed, who Bree had long since given to Sam since the brothers had grown very fond of the wolfhound.

Hunter was a respectable two hundred pounds, and his claw caps which were in fact his natural claws given silver properties, hence the coloring, and very intimidating. He had a spiked collar (probably Dean's idea) and was far more vicious than any normal dog because of how well trained he was. Hunter would never harm humans unless there was something _in_ them, or they were just pretending to be human like a shapeshifter. His natural black fur, which was lined with red streaks, was clean and well groomed.

Dean didn't mind giving Hunter a good brushing if it meant avoiding dog hair in his precious car.

But most of all were the eyes. Hunter's eyes had been a warm brown when Bree had originally gotten him, now that brown was streaked with some inner light that any real demon would recognize.

In short he had come into his full hellhound heritage, though he only loyal to Sam, Dean and Bree. Besides, Dean had no issue spoiling Hunter with any pie he had left and didn't want.

The three drove into town, with Bree using his odd little mini-printer to make more demon traps.

"What's with the printer?" asked Dean.

"I've found you can print a demon trap off a computer so long as you use a certain type of ink...usually I just pay off some suppliers for blood bags donated by the Red Cross with the ink and use that. Instant demon traps without cramping your wrist, just add the final touch."

"Nice. Mind sharing it with Bobby?"

"Who do you think helped to mix the first batch of donated blood and ink? Another fun fact is that these activate only when it comes into contact with anything demonic. Hunter can touch them because he is a hellhound, but anything with constant demon taint won't be able to escape."

Sam looked back at Bree.

"Hey Gabe, I've been meaning to ask... the demon said he had plans for me last time we ran into him. Any idea what he meant?"

"Rumor among the demon grapevine is that Azazel is breeding soldiers to fight in the war against heaven. You were just one of the unlucky bastards picked...though from what I heard you have a different destiny waiting for you," said Bree.

"What destiny?" asked Dean, pausing after he parked the car.

Bree flipped his coin, then shrugged.

"You two are the true vessels of Micheal and Lucifer. At some point Lucifer breaks free and he'll be gunning for Sam when he gets out. When that happens angels are going to be on both your asses, mostly so they can force Dean to act as Micheal's vessel. You have to give consent in order to be used," said Bree.

"Since when do demons need consent to steal bodies?" demanded Dean.

"Lucifer is a former arch-angel. He may have made demons, but he isn't one."

"You're telling me _Lucifer_, Satan, is a former angel?"

"He refused to bow to humanity like all the rest, so God cast his ass down to hell in a cage. Lucifer was pissed so he made demons to harass us, the first of which was named Lilith. Real bitch, that one."

"One of these days you have to tell us how you scare demons that badly without being one."

"Maybe once we're out of here," said Bree.

* * *

It took all of two hours before they were barricaded inside the local doctor's office because of the Croatoan virus.

And exactly five minutes to see how effective Gabe's portable demon's trap were against it.

"How do we know you're not infected?" asked Dean to Gabe.

"I'm immune to something as weak as a demon virus," snorted Bree.

"But why?"

"Let's just say it's in the blood. Demons can't possess me, and this virus can't take hold."

Dean snorted.

"I don't know what you are Gabe, but you're not a demon that's for damn sure. Demons don't side with hunters or just demand cash for their help...and they certainly don't drink holy water without screaming."

Bree grinned at him. At least Dean had more common sense than his father ever did.

"I do have a question...how do you know all this stuff about us?"

"Mostly time travel, combined with being able to cross worlds. The reason why the site is called Monkey Magic is because I'm a research monkey who uses magic. I prefer to hunt without it, so people like your father won't try to kill me on sight," said Bree.

"You're too good to need demon or pagan help. So long as you're on our side, you can hang with us," said Dean.

"So what is this virus?"

"It's called the Croatoan virus. If blood from an infected gets into an open wound, then in a few hours that person gets infected. It's a demonic virus that's a pain in the ass to deal with, because people become more like zombies from some crappy Romero movie instead of rational people. There are few ways to treat it, mostly because it's a pain in the ass to get the one thing that can treat demon blood infections," said Bree. He reached into his bag and pulled out a familiar looking bottle.

"Is that holy water?"

"More like super charged holy water. It's been treated with angel's blood and stirred with unicorn horn. It can purify most demonic taints, though I've never tried it with the Croatoan virus yet."

They drew some blood from Mr. Tanner, who Dean shot, and Bree measured out a small amount of 'super holy water' into the dish. The doctor looked at it through the scope and was amazed.

"The water seems to be eradicating the virus with a vengeance. I've never seen a medicine work that fast."

"Angel blood does _not_ like demon taint. And the rate of infection is pretty high...the whole town might be infected by now."

"How do we know if someone's infected or not?"

"Two things. One is the circle I had printed out on that paper I handed Mrs. Tanner which trapped her, and the other is Hunter. He can smell things like this."

"Dogs aren't allowed in clinics," she said firmly.

"Hunter is not a normal dog, and frankly I can clean up any mess he makes before it becomes an issue," said Bree flatly.

"The roads are blocked," said Dean.

"Thought so. In any case anyone who comes into contact with the outside will have to hold onto one of the special demon traps I printed out and allow Hunter to give them a sniff. If he stays calm, they're clean. If not then we'll double check with the holy water. Anyone infected will start screaming like the damned, but it will clean them out."

Three others came from the outside. The soldier, a girl, and the one that Sam had seen in his vision killed by Dean.

They tied him up when the demon's trap took full form and branded the markings in the ceiling and floor.

"And we have the culprit. Those traps don't react unless you have a demon riding in you..." smirked Bree.

"Have I ever mentioned how much I love those portable devil traps?" said Dean.

"No, but Bobby damn near kissed me the first time it saved him from a demon riding in his neighbor. I had to use an entire bottle of mouthwash," said Bree. Dean laughed.

"What the hell is going on?" demanded the old man.

"This little idiot has a demon inside of him...he probably let the virus loose to draw us in."

"Then why have I been having visions about this?" asked Sam quietly.

"You had a vision of the kid getting offed?" said Bree. Sam nodded.

He looked at Dean with amusement.

"Well that explains who it is. It's not a girl or Azazel...so it must be his son."

Bree walked in with a blade Sam recognized as Bree's favorite. The kid took a deep gasp of shock at the sight of it.

"Recognize what this is do you? Very difficult to get your hands on an angel blade, let alone one of this type. One hit of this and you're a dead demon. Now start talking and I might ignore your existence," said Bree with a cold smirk. He hated demons.

And so the demon-possessed fool started talking. Apparently this was a test to see if Sam would be immune to the virus...the rest were just pawns to draw them in. Finally Bree left Dean in there with the demon kid, who he stabbed in a painful but non-fatal place killing the demon.

Azazel would be pissed when he found out who killed his son and how.

"What about the rest of the town?" asked Sam.

"Two options. Either we force feed them the special holy water...or you two can stay here while I deal with them. They can't infect me...though I will explain why later."

Dean let him go outside and Bree cast some silencing charms that would withstand what was about to happen.

All the people inside the office heard were the screams of pain as Bree dealt with the infected.

When asked later, all he would tell them was that he did a mass-exorcism that was extremely painful for the infected. They would live, but that was it.


	15. FIrst Alternate, Houses of Holy

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* * *

_**First Alternate...after Hunted and during Houses of the Holy**_

Sam and Dean were about to get pie, after sending a fellow hunter to jail. Sam was feeling like crap and Dean felt no remorse for anyone who wanted to hurt Sam.

"Hi boys, how's it hanging?" asked Bree.

"Son of a...Where the hell have you been?" demanded Dean.

Gabe had vanished without a trace after Oregon, without telling them anything.

"Sorry, had to get a few things for you two chuckleheads first. Anyway if you want answers let's find someplace quiet."

Dean found a secluded space right next to where Bree had parked his TARDIS shaped house. Sam looked giddy at the thought of going in there.

"Welcome...to my crib!" said Bree grinning.

Hunter barked as he found his way to his food bowl, which Bree had filled ahead of time. He was wagging his tail big time.

"What the hell?"

"In here not even the angels can spy on us, so I can tell you almost everything. First off, my full name is Gabriel Evans Winchester. I'll explain that last one last. Second, I'm not fully human, but I am something demons rightly fear."

"What are you?" asked Sam.

"I...am an ascended Angelic cambion. Most people mistakenly call people like me Nephilim, though believe me you don't want to met an actual nephilim," said Bree, releasing his angel wings.

"You're an angel?" said Dean.

"Half. My dad was an angel vessel by chance, and mom didn't know even when she died. The proper term for someone like me is angelic cambion, as normal ones are actually demonic. Now, the second thing you need to know is that my human half is actually magical in origin. Before I ascended to full cambion, I was a wizard. Any questions?"

"How did you deal with the infected in Oregon?"

"I spoke Enochian, which is what the angels use as their language, while flaring my Grace. Purged the virus right out of them, though they'll be half-deaf because of it. I made them believe there was an explosion, which I planted, that ruined their hearing."

"Okay, then what about this?" asked Dean gesturing to the place around them.

"A perfect recreation of the Time and Relative Dimensions in Space, or T.A.R.D.I.S. for short. You know that light above us? Well I have a spell that flips a special time-turner that will take us to any point in the past and I can switch it around to take us into the future. A few charms and this thing can take us anywhere in the world...I was on a topless beach outside the Bahamas last time you called me to deal with the virus."

Seeing Dean's look, Bree walked outside and shrunk his car.

He placed the 'model' on a shelf with low-bars around the bottom and inputted where he wanted to go. A few grinding sounds that had Sam grinning with glee, and Bree gestured at the door.

"I dare you to open it," he said. Dean eagerly did so, then gave him a look.

"Is this where I think it is?" he asked.

"A topless beach with cheap booze? Hell yes!" said Bree cackling.

"The only thing that would make this perfect would be..." said Dean.

"Your precious Impala here to impress the girls? What do you think is on that shelf over there? A simple shrinking charm and you'll never worry about those annoying boots the cops use on cars," said Bree smirking.

Dean nearly squealed with glee as he watched his friend return his baby to normal. Sam watched with patient amusement.

"Should we leave Dean here for a few days?" he asked amused.

"Why don't you ask him that?" said Sam.

"Right...let me give him a fake passport and all that good stuff and we'll hit someplace more interesting," said Bree with amusement.

Dean gladly accepted the fake passport and card loaded with three thousand American dollars...and directions to the nearest 'pay-by-hour' hotels and went to enjoy his first vacation in a long time. Bree had promised to pick him up when he was ready to come back home.

Then he took Sam with him to the hidden library of Alexandria, which everyone assumed was destroyed.

Sam dove into the books with glee and accepted the glasses that would allow him to read in whatever language he wanted. After that they went drinking for a few hours and crashed in the house.

After a week Dean and Sam were back on the road hunting, infinitely more cheerful than they had been before. At least they finally had a vacation away from hunting for a while.

* * *

The second they realized they might be dealing with an angel, Sam immediately called Gabe.

"Hey Bree, we have a case you might be interested in... Well all signs point to angels... people have been claiming that an angel told them to do it. So it's not angels?"

Dean looked at Sam, who was clearly disappointed it wasn't an angel.

"Well?"

"He said that it's not an angel. If it were, then they wouldn't be using people who have no faith to do the killings. We're more likely dealing with a ghost," said Sam disappointed.

"Told you," said Dean.

He was inclined to believe Gabe being half-angel, but the idea of an angel using prostitutes and druggies to kill immoral bastards? Not a chance in hell.

As Sam went to deal with the ghost and Dean dealt with the guy that said ghost sent him after, he wondered how Bree knew it wasn't an angel right off the bat.

Another random thought was if Bree knew any arch angels. He would have to ask the next time they ran into him. Too bad the priest in charge showed up...but on a plus side he got to see that the ghost priest pass on, which was nice.

* * *

Bree snickered as Dean all but devoured the pie he made. He knew his cooking was good, particularly anything with sugar in it. Sam chuckled around his coffee, just how he liked it. He knew how good a cook Gabe was, since he was usually the one he tested his concoctions on.

They spent more on groceries than they did on restaurants, it was just that good.

Bobby was just glad the boys had found someone they could trust to have their back so he could have time off himself. Last time Bree showed up, he took Bobby on an all expenses paid vacation to someplace sunny for a week without asking for anything in return.

That more than anything convinced Bobby he wasn't evil. No one evil could possibly take a hunter to an uncharted island off of Tahiti and not ask for anything in return. And the fact he could drink holy water like it was a shot glass, wore silver earrings and was immune to salt and demon traps was more than enough to convince Bobby he wasn't evil. He was just too nice.

Well...that and the fact that Bree gave him more books for him to deal with the supernatural baddies out there. And organized his library for him, from useful ones and helping him replace the ones that were full of crap.

The fact he felt _safe_ in a demon and ghost proof room had only been the clincher. Nothing truly worth hunting would feel safe in a room meant to keep bad things out, or feel so at ease to actually fall _asleep_ in it!

"Dude, you are my new god," said Dean around his apple pie.

"Ironically Loki said something similar after we became roommates and I cooked a cake with enough sugar to kill a diabetic with a single bite. He all but claimed me after that one," chuckled Bree. And that was the only reason Loki had let him stay around so long as to call him brother.

"Loki is real?"

"Real and a total sugar-crazed nut. If you want to know it's him, get him some fruity drink laced with enough sugar to make you sick and watch him drink it. Anyone who can handle my special 'Sonic Screwdriver' with extra chocolate liquor is definitely a possible trickster."

Dean choked on his pie.

"You've made a drink called the sonic screwdriver?"

"It was after a _Doctor Who_ marathon...oi, don't give me that look you grease monkey!" said Bree playfully.

"Nerd."

"Jock."

"Bitch."

"Ass."

"Feather duster!"

"Pie demon."

Sam choked a laugh at that one. So did Bobby.

"Bookworm!"

"Man-whore."

Sam and Bobby were watching this exchange with open amusement. Bobby even made some popcorn as the two traded half-hearted barbs at each other.

Finally the two called a truce and broke out laughing.

"You're alright Gabe!" said Dean with a grin.

"Thank you Mr. I-have-an-angel-as-a-Fate-Bond."

"What?"

"You heard me. The one your destined to be with is an angel, a Seraph to be exact. Not telling you who though...that would ruin all my fun at your reaction and I don't have any cameras on me!"

"Angels are real?"

"Very real, but they aren't interested in helping humans at the moment. Hell they think we're below them and wouldn't hesitate to kill someone just because they were ordered to by another angel. I believe the most popular nickname for them is dicks with wings," said Bree.


	16. FIrst Alternate, Born Under A Bad Sign

Bree was awoken in his bed after another fun day in Japan learning how to use a proper samurai sword (he was taking bushido lessons out of boredom in a small village that still practiced it the way it should be) when he heard Dean's panicked voice.

Apparently Sam hadn't come back and he was worried. And his first instinct was to call Bree for help, since he had told the brothers that he could hack the phone's GPS to find them whenever he felt like it. Sam always had his phone on him. The only reason he hadn't called immediately was because he had Hunter try to find his brother first.

Hunter was uncannily good at locating Sam within ten miles.

Bree immediately hacked Sam's phone and found him. It took him a moment to figure out what was going on, and he was less than pleased.

It was Azazel's bitchy daughter, he was sure of it. Wouldn't she be in for a nasty shock once she realized what the belt buckle he gave Sam actually did.

* * *

The demoness growled at the stupid belt buckle refused to cooperate. She had been stuck in Sam's body for several hours and he needed to use the restroom. Suddenly she touched the sigil and cried out in pain.

"What the hell?" she said in Sam's voice. Sam suddenly laughed at her, realizing what was going on.

"Shut it Sammy," she sneered. She grabbed the buckle fully...before she found herself in a ball made of pure energy, and Sam looking at her in surprise.

"Only Gabe..." he said amused. He had fought her hard enough in the initial take over to keep her from branding him, so she could be exorcised. If she hadn't been so preoccupied with the belt he might not have been able to force her out.

As if he could sense her shock and confusion at this sudden turn of events, he smirked at her.

"Unicorn horn willingly given and Enochian sigils made with Grace. Guaranteed to keep a demon occupied long enough to exorcise. Speaking of Gabe..." said Sam, sensing his friend coming up to the door.

Gabe was whistling a song from his favorite band, _Linkin Park _when Sam opened the door.

"She try to take the buckle off?" he smirked.

Sam nodded in amusement. Then he remembered a pressing need, and ran to the bathroom.

Bree looked at the ball of malevolent energy with a sneer worthy of Snape at his worst.

"What's the matter? The big bad demon bitch couldn't handle a simple angel glyph engraved on a unicorn horn?" he said with a smirk.

He could hear her scream profanities to make even a seasoned sailor blush from the mist. Being a cambion had it's perks. He finally grew tired of listening to her bitch about his trick with the buckle he had given Sam nearly three years ago and brought out the arch angel blade. She shut up in a hurry from shock.

"Much better. See I have no need of any information you could give about Azazel or Lucifer...and yes I do know about Lilith preparing to break the seals if Dean is ever sent to hell. You just had the bad luck of pissing off the Walker who already has experience with killing your kind."

He could sense her terror as she registered what he just said. Heaven wasn't the only one who feared the Walker, demons were terrified of him even more, because most of the time he went on a killing spree until the balance was restored.

A Walker easily had the power to destroy them so completely that not even Lucifer could restore them.

Sam was standing next to Bree with a curious look on his face.

"What's a Walker?"

"Someone picked by either God, Fate, Death or one of the immortal powerhouses that even Lucifer wouldn't poke with a stick at to restore the balance. Usually God or Fate though. Demons are terrified of them, more so than angels because Walkers, or Walking Men, can destroy them so utterly that they can never exist again. The angels have likely figured out I'm a cambion of some sort who got his hands on another angel's grace, but if they find out I'm the Walker they'll go ballistic. Now what should we do with this pain in the ass?" asked Bree.

"Kill her for all I care. Somehow I get the feeling you don't actually need any information from her, and if she tried to give you any you would kill her anyway."

"You know me far too well," said Bree with a grin.

The demon screeched in fear and started babbling in hopes he would at least not destroy her completely.

Being sent back to the pit as a ghost was better than that!

Bree cocked his head at some of the information she gave him...things like the Leviathans being locked in the pit, how Lucifer's sealing would only be the first in a wave of even stronger evil. Some of the information would be useful later, so he decided to humor her.

"I'll give you two options. Either you go back into the pit and don't come back so long as I'm around...or I can just kill you now. Some of that information has made me...reconsider...destroying you utterly."

She practically screamed for the pit once he gave her the option. No way in Lucifer's name was she going after the Winchesters twice if they were protected by a Walker!

Bree broke the containment spell, and the black smoke rushed downward to safety. He wouldn't bother going into Hell...not where Lucifer could sense his grace. Once was quite enough thank you!

* * *

"Sam!" Dean rushed to his brother's side, Hunter keeping pace with him.

"I'm fine. Gabe's belt buckle captured her before she could actually do anything."

"Unicorn horn belt buckle with an Enochian containment spell. The second she fully touched the thing to remove it, it removed her. Demons hate that spell."

"She was so busy trying to remove it that she couldn't brand me like she planned."

"Brand?" said Dean.

"There is a demon glyph that can make it impossible to exorcise them the old fashioned way. It has to be applied within the first forty-eight hours or it can be removed. Because she was so eager to get the belt off, she didn't have time to brand him with it. You should have heard her cussing when she realized I was the one to give it to Sammy," smirked Bree. Dean snorted in amusement.

"So what now?"

"Now we get some sleep in a place that's actually clean and I'll join you for a while. I'm bored," said Bree.

In reality it was because he knew they were going to run into Gabriel next, and he wanted to see the show.


	17. First Alternate, Tall Tales

_**First Alternate...Episode: Tall Tales**_

Bree was snorting with laughter when he finally ran into Gabriel. He had heard how the professor was offed, and he had to admit it was funnier watching the guys stumble about first hand.

Loki gave him an odd look.

"I remember you...but I don't know why. Who are you?"

"Come on Gabriel, quit pretending. We both know you remember getting killed by Lucifer in that hotel and then waking back up exactly where you were at the point Mary Winchester was killed by Azazel," said Bree flatly.

Loki, no Gabriel, winced visibly.

"Maybe this will help you remember?" said Bree, taking out a familiar sword. Gabriel's eyes widened comically as he brought out an identical copy. Right down to the last detail.

"Who...what are you?" he asked.

"Name's Gabriel Evans. I'm a Walker sent to correct the alternates since things kept getting so screwed up until a hundred and thirty-five versions in. I'm not about to mess with your fun, but I will be watching you prank Dean and Sam," grinned Bree.

Gabriel suddenly grinned, as he caught to the double meaning.

"Is that a challenge I hear?" he asked eagerly.

"Let's see how long it takes them to catch on that they're being pranked. They already know I was once Loki's roommate, so it should be entertaining to see their reaction," smirked Bree.

"You're on kid! Just don't stab me with the sword okay?"

"Why the hell would I stab my own father?" asked Bree loudly, enjoying the fact that Loki/Gabriel stumbled and fell flat on his face from the shock. He had tripped on the sidewalk.

"You're kidding right?"

"Not a chance. A hundred and thirty-five alternates in you take James Potter as a vessel and I ended up being born. I was thrown back all the way to the beginning by Fate and now I'm making my way all the way back to my own alternate."

"Okay, now I really want to show you up," said Loki grumpily. The kid had timed that statement far too well for it to not be a set-up.

Bree laughed as they proceeded to prank the Winchesters.

* * *

"Dammit Gabe, how did you manage to play that heavy metal crap?" demanded Dean.

"It's Metal, not heavy metal. And _Linkin Park_ happens to be an awesome band," said Bree snickering.

"Yeah, well how the hell am I supposed to change the damn music?" asked Dean.

"You're not," said Bree, trying not to smirk.

Bree had a spell which would allow him to play _his_ music instead of Dean's. Considering he didn't have many rock songs in his music player, this meant he was all but torturing Dean with different genres of music. Sam had nearly laughed himself sick at the look on Dean's face when Bree played Irish Tenors.

Of course that was nothing compared to the look on _both_ their faces when Bree on-upped Loki by setting Sam's laptop on a series of Wincest sites. It had taken Sam fifteen minutes to realize that the guys in the pictures/fanfics were him and Dean. It had taken Dean twenty minutes.

Loki still hadn't stopped laughing when he heard about their reactions. Apparently both brothers nearly heaved when they realized what they were looking at. The worst part was that Bree had locked the computer so it could only go onto _those_ sites.

He had told Sam that it was impossible for him to clean up his computer as his had gotten a virus. That was how he covered up why he wasn't helping either of them at the moment.

"Besides, who said I had anything to do with why your precious cassette tapes can only play a different genre than they are labeled?"

"Come on man! Enough is enough!" said Dean.

"Not my fault," singsonged Bree.

Actually it was, but he wasn't telling Dean that. He sniffed loudly.

"Either of you smell something?" he asked.

"UGH! It smells like dead fish!" said Sam, rolling down the window to get some air.

"YUCK!" said Bree, practically jumping out of the seat when he realized there was a dead fish under him.

Hunter whined.

"Everybody out of the car!" said Dean in disgust.

It took them ten minutes to find the dead fish (there were three, one for each hunter) and exactly two seconds for Dean to notice his tires had all gone flat.

"Son of a bitch!"

It only got worse from there.

Sam found lube in his gear. Dean found dead mice in his. They were so pissed at each other that they never considered Bree to be the one doing most of the more amusing ones.

In reality it was more along the lines of a competition to see how long it took the brothers to call Bobby for help.

Bree was able to cover his non-involvement by hiding behind his site and pretending to call other hunters in different languages. He couldn't wait to see the looks on their faces when they found out Bree had been helping Loki prank them.

Though really, using the tabloids for ideas was just so boring in his opinion. Surely Loki could do much better.

* * *

Bobby came in an hour after Dean found another dead animal in his car. This time it was a rat in the glove box. He was pissed at whoever kept leaving them in his baby.

"I think it's pretty obvious what's going on here. You've got a trickster on your hands," said Bobby.

"Loki, to be more precise. Hey Bobby."

"What?" said Sam.

"Yeah, Loki's been hanging around campus pranking people. I noticed him immediately and challenged him to a prank war about a week ago," shrugged Bree.

"You knew he was here and didn't tell us?" said Dean, outraged.

"I knew the whole time. Hell, most of the good pranks were my work. Loki's been using tabloids for ideas," said Bree smirking.

"You put the lube and the mice in our bags," said Sam.

"The lube and the computer thing was my doing, as was the ever changing music in the car. The dead animals were all Loki's fault. Though I did leave a rat in Dean's glove box an hour ago."

Dean looked ready to strangle Bree for that.

"Though I have to admit, the look on your face when you realized what you were reading was hysterical. I have pictures!" cackled Bree. Bobby came over to look at the digital camera and he actually snorted in amusement.

"What the hell did you do to make them look like that?"

"Don't ask," came the twin responses of Sam and Dean immediately.

"Which reminds me, Loki and I are going out drinking in a bit. Ta!" said Bree laughing. He vanished before Dean could hit him with something.

* * *

Bree and Loki downed another sonic screwdriver (the drink Bree made especially for Loki) with a grin.

"To pranks!" said Loki.

"To the look on their faces when they realized they were reading a Wincest story with smut!" cackled Bree. Loki laughed with him, as their reaction had been particularly amusing.

"How long you in town?" asked Loki.

"Right up until they try to stab you with something. I enchanted their best knives to kill demons but they might try to borrow the sword. I've already hidden the Impala, and Bobby should be willing to drive them back to his place to regroup."

Bree's last prank was to hide the Impala in his place and leave a note on Sam's computer that he was going. They would have to leave with Bobby in order to go on another hunt.

Loki and Bree both got drunk off their ass, as the prank war had been quite enjoyable.

"So...any chance I could join the Trickster groups once this whole end-of-the-world nonsense is finally done?"

"Kid, with how good you are I wouldn't doubt that you could join today!" said Loki.

"Almost wish I could! Being the Walker sucks, if it wasn't for the look on demon's faces when you tell them who you are!" said Bree, completely drunk.

Loki almost immediately sobered up.

"You're the Walker?"

"The innocent who fell into hell to save the condemned while dragging the damned. Even brought back Lucy's Grace with me when I ascended," said Bree, dragging his thumb along a thick chain that ended in a vial that was fairly big. Loki's eyes almost doubled at the sight of it.

Finally Bree toppled over from drinking one too many vodka shots. Loki gingerly carried him outside the odd mini-bar that the kid had brought him to (he would have to ask what the deal was with the blue box later) to the first bed he found. He still had to finish this off anyway.

The second he stepped out, the blue box (with the words Police Public Call Box emblazoned in white paint along the top) made a wheezing groan and vanished.

Maybe one of the amusing Winchesters would know what the deal was.

* * *

"Where is Gabe?" demanded Dean. He planned to prank the hell out of the guy for all the crap they put him through.

"Last time I saw the runt, he was sound asleep in that weird blue box of his, dead drunk. That kid can put away the vodka!" said Loki cheerfully.

Apparently they believed him about that. How odd.

"Coincidentally what's with the blue box anyway?" asked Loki.

"It's a magical recreation of the T.A.R.D.I.S., off an old show called _Doctor Who_," said Sam, eying Loki warily.

"Huh...might have to try that series. So, shall we boys?" grinned Loki.

Sam suddenly got the feeling that staking Loki wouldn't do a damn thing.

"Is there any chance we could convince you to leave here without a fight?" Sam asked.

Loki looked at Sam surprised.

"Sammy, we don't deal with monsters!" said Dean.

"Dean, this Loki reminds me too much of Gabe to kill him. Hell, they even look alike!" said Sam in his defense.

Dean paused and actually _looked_ at Loki. Now that Sam mentioned it, he did look far too much like Gabe. They had similar faces and mischievous eyes.

"The only difference is the hair and eyes. Staking you won't do a damn thing will it?" said Dean suspiciously.

"Nope. Had to give the hunters something to work with!" said Loki far too cheerfully.

Dean and Sam shared a look.

"Touch my car or leave dead animals in the Impala again and you're a dead Trickster. I don't care if I have to _make_ a way, I will end you," said Dean seriously. He was still trying to get the fish smell out!

"Fair enough."

Bobby was very grumpy because he had to drive the idjits back to his house, since Bree had hidden the Impala. He actually cursed up a storm when he found the prankster in his kitchen with fresh pie and the Impala parked out back. It was clear Bree still had a hangover.

Dean took far too much pleasure in being loud for the rest of the day as payback for the crap Bree put them through.


	18. First Alternate, Hollywood Babylon

_**First alternate, episode Hollywood Babylon **_

Dean and Sam were checking out LA when they heard a phone ring. It had a song that wasn't from their time. Looking around, Sam spotted a familiar face.

"Gabe?!"

"Yo Sammy!"

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I'm playing an angel who comes to save the heroine in some cheesy horror flick. Apparently the director overheard me correcting the chick's Latin, because their translation was totally botched."

"Dude," said Dean, tapping Sam on the shoulder when he spotted the main character in the film.

"I can get you guys on the set if you want," grinned Gabe.

"How the hell did you get on a movie?" asked Sam.

"One, I'm a hot guy who can speak perfect Latin. Two, I actually know a thing or two about the supernatural. And Three, I sorta confunded them into thinking I was the guy who saves their ass at the end of the movie," said Gabe.

"So what, you're the angel who sweeps in to save the hot chick?" said Dean.

"Yup."

"That is so unfair," said Dean.

"You can be my assistant, and Sammy here can be an extra," said Gabe.

"Count me in!" said Dean.

"Why are you even here?" asked Sam.

"Because some idiot put an actual necromantic summoning ritual in a damn movie and I felt the chick reciting it out of order," deadpanned Gabe.

Now Sam knew why he was there. Gabe would never let something as annoying as necromancy pass.

"Besides, the dumbass director has me doing the ritual since I can speak Latin better than Tara."

Gabe leaned against the trailer.

"The irony is that the original script was actually pretty good. I can't wait to see the guy's face when I blast the spirits back to wherever he called them from using the counterspell," grinned Gabe.

"So why do you need us?"

"Screentime anyone? Besides, I need you to keep deaths down to a minimum."

* * *

"Found our summoner...little shit doesn't even understand why forcing a ghost to murder is a bad idea," chuckled Gabe.

"So what are we going to do?" asked Sam.

"Depends."

"On what?"

"If the dumbass knows what happens when you brake the talisman. I've read ahead of the script. When confronted by Sammy, he does the stupid thing and breaks the talisman controlling them. They get pissed and kill him, while the director puts the whole incident in the script."

"And you're here again why?" asked Sam.

"Screen time. Might as well have some fun with this, besides how often does someone like me in up in an actual movie that isn't a porno?" snickered Gabe.

"Good point," said Dean.

"So when do we nab this loser?" asked Gabe.

"Let me finish lunch," said Dean.

The kid who summoned the ghosts didn't make it, as Gabe had correctly guessed that he would break the talisman without realizing the consequences.

Before they parted ways, Gabe slipped something around Sam's wrist.

"What's this?"

"Emergency dog whistle. Azazel's going to make his big move soon, and I would rather not see you dead. You activate this by concentrating on Hunter, and he'll appear wherever you are. I already attached the other end to his new collar. This activates, I come straight to wherever you are," said Gabe.

"What's his big game?"

"He doesn't need soldiers Sam. Demons are stronger and more useful than any psychic. He needs someone to lead them, someone with the gift. Which is why I'm also giving you this. A kit for any demon you come across. It has salt, iron, the works. Keep it on you at all times," said Gabe seriously, handing Sam a bag.

"What is he going to do?"

"Last man standing. He only needs _one_ psychic Sammy. If I help you now, then Lilith has trouble grabbing Dean later," said Gabe bluntly.

Dean had to sell his soul in order for Lilith to take him to hell.

"Gabe...what do I do?"

"Azazel can't bring out his army. If one of the psychics goes missing, then stay together," said Gabe seriously.

Sam spent the better part of a month memorizing Hunter's appearance. When the time came he would have to call the hellhound to him, otherwise he would be in serious trouble.

Three months after Gabe slipped the bracelet on Sam's wrist, he went missing in a diner full of dead people with sulfur in his wake.

The race to find Sam was on.


End file.
